I Will Never Admit It
by Reverberating Winds
Summary: Genma takes a glance at Anko one morning, and the shocking reality has hit him. He won't believe it, much less admit it, but he knows. And so does everyone else. Incomplete.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Mockery of the Sun

Second fic! Constructive Criticism welcome!

Oh, yeah. I don't own Naruto. Why the HELL does everyone want to rub it in?!

The thought of waking up is enough to give me nightmares. So far, it's six in the morning and I'm laying here. Like a log. In my bed, tangled in the warm sheets. So far, I have made the stretch of turning off the damned alarm clock, and I just passed the horribly realistic and agonizing step of acknowledging the fact that I have no choice but to get up. I haven't even opened my eyes yet. The sun is mocking with its little rays of light coming in to greet me…if the sun were to blow up or something, I wouldn't really care as long as I could sleep. I would be asleep eternally, so, no, that wouldn't quite work. Now I have to haul my ass out of the bed. The other agonizing part. The rest goes on with 'decorative' words to 'decorate' the already morose environment.

So now I'm dressed, standing in my apartment making preparations to not 'lose' my sanity with Anko…my _partner. _The psychotic lady that yells at me for no reason. I don't let myself be bossed around, especially by_ her, _so we end up yelling at each other and then Tsunade yells at us because we didn't get anything done. Cycle of Abuse. By the way, Anko always starts this, not me. Fetching my infamous toothpick and heading out, I tried to look alive as I went off to the main building. You might as well call me a zombie, it'd be more accurate. "Genma!" I ignored Raidou. He may be my best friend, but he actually LIKES mornings. Mind boggling, how is it even possible to enjoy getting out of bed and having all the energy in the world like him? Yes, I eat breakfast, but it makes no difference. "Genma, good morning!"

"…ugh…"

"Heheh, you're such a bed bug! Hurry, or Anko will be pissed."

"Don't remind me…" I replied, passing Raidou. He just chuckled and got back to work. A chuckle. In the morning. That, I don't think, ever will, can, or has happened to me.

Somehow, I managed to drag myself into Tsunade's office. Anko was already waiting for me. "Genma, you're early. Good. Anko and you will be running errands for me. Getting papers, filing things, sending out letters, checking my e-mail, all that." Tsunade had recently decided to make the other jounin do her work. Unfair, but she couldn't care less.

"Yay." Anko said dryly, making a swirl in the air with her finger. A snicker escaped my lips, and how, I don't know at all. There must be something wrong with me to even make a sound of laughter in the morning. Whatever. I'm too tired to care. I realized suddenly both women were looking at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh my god. Did he just…_laugh_?" choked out Tsunade.

"I think so." replied Anko, walking over to me. Taking of my headband, like I even gave _her _permission to, she put a hand on my forehead, scowling. But why, why oh why, did my heart suddenly flutter? Now I'm getting heart disease. Great, I'm going to die at a young age. If Asuma hasn't died yet because of lung or heart disease yet, why am I here feeling my heart doing little skips and squirming in my chest? Oh, for the record, I don't even smoke, so someone explain _that _to me!

"Uh, wow. He's not even feverish at all." Anko removed her hand and I hastily put on my headband again. We both turned to look a Tsunade, who raised an eyebrow suggestively. "What?" demanded Anko, folding her arms obstinately. She looked...no, I have to get that out of my head. She did NOT look cute when she made that pout. Wow, along with heart disease, now I'm suffering from senile dementia. If I'm not past fifty, that is definitely a problem.

"Nothing!" quickly replied, Tsunade hiding a smile, "Nothing at all, actually..." she snickered and got out of her chair. "Alright, it's up to you guys. So, I'm off. Toodles!" Tsunade grabbed her purse and took off. We shifted around uncomfortably.

"Well...what now?" asked Anko.

"Uh...paperwork, right?"

"Yeah."

"So..."

"I'll do the e-mails and half of the paperwork and errands, so you'd do the other half of the delivery...yeah."

"Okay," I agreed. I walked over to the stack of papers and grimaced before I picked up a pen and got to work. Anko was already replying to an e-mail. At once, I began to chew my toothpick fervently. Paperwork made me edgy. The noise of the pen on paper, the feeling of your wrists, and most of all the fact I have no patience for this crap. I don't like doing this, much less in the morning, and no, I'm not a nocturnal freak or something, okay? I just like to sleep and I'm not, as you know by now, a morning person.

We worked for three hours straight. I'm not kidding, my eyes never strayed the blankness of the paper, and by now, I must have gone colorblind. Anko sighed suddenly, and getting my attention, I looked up to make sure everything was alright. Wait, why do I care? She's my partner, not a friend, I'm forced to work with her. Nonetheless, I looked at her, and my chest got that stupid prancing feeling. I shuddered, not only at the thought I probably have heart disease and senile dementia, but it was the only way to relieve that tickle. Now, why did I look at her in the first place? She looked the same...but she had taken out the ponytail, and she gave to computer screen a blank stare. She looked, well, pretty. Normal, sub-psycho, but mostly pretty. Okay, so this is the new thing. I'm hallucinating. Did I just think she was pretty? Wow, I seriously need help.

"What was that all about?" she asked, amused, "Were you having a seizure?"

"I...was stretching!" I lied. She smiled and got back to work. Why does my heart dance around when I look at her? I'm looking at her discreetly as I can, and I'm so sure that if the Richter scale measured the my quaky heart, it would measure higher than and eight, I'm sure. Great, now I'm catching a fever. My palms are beginning to sweat. Well, I have been holding a pen for three hours, what else could it be...? And why are my cheeks suddenly getting all hot and gross? This is bad. I must, I HAVE to be suffering from some disease, whether it's senile dementia or some terminal cardio problem, and there is one more thing. But I won't believe it, much less admit it, to myself or anyone else.

I can't be in love with Anko Mitarashi. I just can't.

That was chapter 1! The story gets better! Just keep reading, and please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Seeking Professional Advice

I don't own Naruto, okay? Get over it.

Well. This sucks.

I went to the doctor today. I thought that if I'm going to die, I might as well know what I'm going to die from. So, I went to the doctor this morning. I explained the symptoms, and that old geezer just raised an eyebrow and looked at me like I were on drugs. I insisted on tests to make sure everything was alright. I got a blood test and everything. The doctor, however, said there was nothing in my blood and I was _healthy_. Then he just burst out laughing. LAUGHING. Oh, and I forget to mention it was eight in the morning. Then he said "No, no! You're not sick! You're in love! And, you just wasted one hundred dollars! Good luck with the ladies! Har har har!"

…that explains why I have a thick bandage on my arm and why I have to write with my left hand instead of right. Also, it wasn't pleasant to have a bunch of senile old guys laughing at you especially this early. Before you ask, I have proof they're senile. I'm not in love, and if I was, it wouldn't be with Anko. Also, we barely know each other. Oh no. OH NO. If I'm falling into the 'love at first sight' thing, I have issues. Well, I've looked at her a million times, and I thought 'I hate her' for most of those times. Whatever. I'll deal with that later, the main thing is seeking professional advice…but I'm broke. This is going to be a long day.

It's raining and cold. Really cold. Which is a nice change. Only problem is my umbrella was broken the last time it rained. I stabbed Asuma with it on ACCIDENT in the diaphragm, and before he passed out he snapped the umbrella in two. So, now I'm wet and walking into the main building hiding my face the best I could. I turned into Tsunade's office and found Anko there. Damn Tsunade, she's off in Hawaii. In October, but hey, to whatever floats her bitchy boat. Anko smiled at me. "You look like a hobo."

"Yeah, well, I feel like one, so don't worry about it." She laughed. Fuck that Prancing feeling. It's so pranc-y, I'm just going to call it attack of the reindeers. Gay Rudolph and his Santa pals are making my life hell. It'll probably make me have seizures to relieve the feeling soon. I just realized how pretty Anko's laugh was. It's sort of high pitched, but refreshing. I don't think I've ever heard such a nice sound. She stood up from the chair and walked over to me. Anko slipped some of my wet hair in through her fingers and frowned. It took all of my self control to stop a swoon right then and there.

"You know you'll probably be sick, soon right?" she said. I'm not planning on visiting any doctors for a while, but I am cold and feel a tad bit strange.

"Eh, I'll be fine. Don't worry about it." Anko made a face and let her hand drop by her side.

"You sure?"

"Yeah…" at this point I had to look at the ground to avoid fainting. She was pretty. And this time, I won't reject that thought. It's true. My heart rate suddenly increased and I began to feel sickish and weird. So, what's next? Cancer? Pneumonia? Oh, with my luck it'll be amputation. Involving gangrene and infection, I bet...if I don't stop these thoughts I'll probably end up killing myself.

"Alright. Let's get to work…Genma?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to…" No, oh please no. Not that question. I can't deal with that right now. I just can't be caught in a restaurant with her. I don't love her. Yeah, that's right…I don't love her… "ditch this? This is GAY. I want to waste my day in some other way. Want to join me?"

"Sure." Too late. I had just accepted to something I knew I would regret. She flashed a smile at me and left the room I followed, what other choice did I have?

Anko stepped outside and opened up her umbrella. She let me get under it. A wave of heat washed over me and I was suddenly hit with the realization something had taken my hand. Warm, soft, and oddly comforting. If it is what I think it is, before the attack of the reindeer takes over, I shouldn't take it in my own hand. Suppressing my eyes from any movement, they flew down to my hand…laced into Anko's. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw she was blushing. Next stop, eye doctor! Anko does not blush. It's just a known fact. But then again, if I'm capable of blushing, especially in the morning, then she certainly can blush. "Um…do you…mind?" she whispered avoiding, eye contact.

"Not at all." I replied. So I just spoke my mind. Or part of it. If I were some sort of retard I might scream out about how her touch is the most exhilarating brush of warmth I've ever felt. But I'm not. Okay, maybe a bit, but…ANYWAY…

"Okay. Good. I like you more than you think." she said. The reindeer attacked me. I rested my free hand over my chest in my vain attempt to stop the writhing from my diaphragm to my heart. "You okay?" she asked. I sighed.

"You know this feeling…you get, and it's like a fluttery sort of thing in your chest or heart? I just got it." I wasn't going to add the fact it plagues me when it look or think about her.

"I know it familiarly…" chuckled Anko. I just snickered. Like I would even admit how I really feel. But something tells me she already knows me all too well. My theory was proven correct when she took notice of something before I noticed it.

"You're sick. I can tell." Anko said looking up at him. "Your cheeks are rosy, yet you're pale. And," Anko put the back of her hand on my cheek. It was so cool, like water on spring day. She frowned. "You're catching something. Aw! Poor you, how do you feel right now?" I felt worse because she touched me. Again. Without my permission. Maybe it's just a girl thing…She hit the nail right on the head, through. I, frankly, felt like shit. I didn't realize the writhing in my stomach or the pitch and roll of my head until she just _had_ to point it out and make me feel helpless as a puppy. Of course, I won't admit feel sick until I-- well, I just won't say it.

"I feel fine. No problems here." That was the dumbest, most retarded thing I could've said. Anko giggled.

"You sound like Hayate after his spastic asthma attacks when he's gasping for air and claiming he'll be okay." That made me laugh.

"No, seriously, I'm fine."

"Oh, so you're hot because you're blushing, or what? Not used to girls?" Damn it! How the hell did she know? What is she, some sort of psycho freak? She can see right through me. I have no choice but to say it, then.

"Eh…yes." I replied meekly. "Girls, they aren't my thing. At all. Not that I care, of course, because--"

"Actually, Genma, you're quite popular." Anko replied a-matter-of-factly.

"What?! How? How come I don't know this?" Well, then. Now I find out that I'm the 'sexy' one of Konoha. Really, I'm thrilled.

"Well," Anko paused to giggle, "You're considered…never mind. Forget it." Yeah, all I needed to hear was that I was in high demand for being raped. I truly am stunned by the retardation of humanity. I sighed and shook my head. "I don't think you'd want to know."

"I don't need to know, actually." I said.

"So…what do you think of Kurenai? In looks, I mean." Anko asked, trying to sound casual. Why did she want to know what I thought of Kurenai? Well, to put it simply, she is H-O-T. But Anko is…H-O-T-T-E-R. Did I just…? Aw, forget this. I'm still not in love though! I will never be in love with Anko. Looks aren't everything…but no, seriously, Kurenai is like, beyond hot. But Anko makes me melt.

"Kurenai? Meh. She's okay…" I replied.

"_Okay_? Specify." Shit.

"Well, she's okay. Nice. I guess, I mean-- why do you want to know?"

"Oh!" Anko quickly looked away, but I could see she was embarrassed. "Curious. She's in high demand, too."

"For what? Rape?"

"No…yes. Sort of. We females have our sources." What kind of sources? I don't and never plan to know how they know this stuff.

"Okay. So, what do you like to do for fun?" I asked. I didn't feel like hearing who was on the list for rape. Not now, anyway.

"Ooh, eating dango and drawing. I like to draw, but you'd never guess by what I look like. I also like to shop, who doesn't, but yeah. I also like hanging out with you."

"Uh, Anko? This is technically the first time we have hung out." I pointed out.

"No, we've been partnered for six months. All those days count as hanging out, even though we fought all the time." Anko smiled at me and leaned on me. Attack of the reindeers flared. "But I don't know. I really like you now. I also respect you. I fact, I've thought…highly of you for a while." she laughed. I forced a smile.

"Really? Ah."

"What do you think of me, Genma?" inquired Anko. I'm going to shoot myself. I swear.

"Oh, uh, yeah, I respect you…too."

"Hmm."

We walked on in silence. The attacking reindeers retreated. Finally, I thought I was having a heart attack. Okay. Review. She said she likes me. But she never would've said so if I hadn't been the dumb ass to say "Sure!" in invitation to go on a walk. But I did. So, know I know she "respects" and "likes" me. I hope she means "like" as the opposite of hate, not the lovey-dovey I feel for-- I DON'T feel for her. I'm not in love. Not one bit. I won't admit it. Never. But then again, I can't fight it. Especially staring into her lovely eyes, only seeing her, not the brush around us, the falling rain, only her. Only he, Anko. I was blinded to everything but her. I'm either dreaming, or…

I'm falling in love with Anko Mitarashi.

Yeah. That's chapter 2. Sorry, it wasn't as good as the Chapter One, but this is the changing point, and I can't reveal too much yet. You'll see what happens, so REVIEW and keep reading…please. Seriously, review, okay? Seriously.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Panic Attack

I don't own Naruto. Obviously.

A new day, a new problem. That's how my life works. I hate but it, but well, what can you do. I'm already dressed…well, to not suffer in the morning, I just slept in my jounin uniform. No one has to know, nor will they ever know. It's my secret. But, I'm really sure something retarded will happen so that by the end of the day associating with me would be social suicide. I'm used to it. Today, I didn't have to get up so ridiculously early. I got to get up at eight instead of six. Tsunade called last night telling me to chill out for an extra two hours. Coming from her, that's a miracle. It also put me in a better mood. Not by much, though, but enough so people can _almost_ tolerate me.

As I walked calmly to the building, I was reminded of the coming holiday: Halloween, in a week. That made me wonder what us jounin would plan to do. Scare the genin shitless, have a wild party…yeah. The one Kakashi hosted last year was insane. Everyone got drunk and the next day we all missed work because of hangover! How fun! Not fun. Tsunade was pissed with us just because we had a party. Well, hey, not my fault no one would ever invite her to even a get together. Raidou suddenly flanked me, carrying papers. "Hi!"

"Hey."

"Guess what today is?" Raidou said, grinning. Wow. This guy must be on some sort of drug to make him so happy. I'm never that happy. I do get close when Anko is around, though. I scowled at him.

"Um…a week till Halloween pre-celebration?" I guessed. Raidou would tell me anyway. We established that a while back when I almost strangled him. It was morning, and suspense isn't that great at such an hour. He shook his head.

"Today is Anko's birthday!"

"WHAT?!" I said that a little too loud. I got stares that suggested I needed a straitjacket. "Oh, I mean, uh, no big deal." Damn. It almost slipped-- wait, what almost slipped? Nothing, because I'm not in love with Anko. Never will be…if I can help it. Geez…this won't work…

"O-kay, whatever you say, Genma. See ya!" Raidou took off somewhere happily, leaving me to panic. What do I get her? I'm broke, I seriously have nothing in my wallet but some spare change and my jounin license. Oh, old receipts too, but that's not going to help at all. I could pick flowers off the side of the road…what's the difference between a weed and a flower? They all look the same! Well, who cares, the little thingies that are all poofy should do. Then I'll find something else. Along the way. Or do something that I'll never do, and I'd really be the social reject if I _did_ do it…a little kiss won't hurt…WAIT, WHAT?! Where the hell did that come from? Ew! Ugh! I don't want that thought in my head. Okay. I have the flowers, I'm all set.

Gathering all my confidence quickly, I carried myself proudly, even though people looked at me weird. In the distance I could see Kurenai. So I walked quicker. As I was about to say "Hi", she stopped me. "Genma, why are you holding dandelions?" she asked, frowning. I looked down at the poofy flowers, and that made a memory vivid. "_Genma! Don't blow on that, our whole yard will be full of those!"_ Right. How many times did mom tell me to not blow on them? I was pretty embarrassed.

"I…was, er…trying to clean up the community!" Wow, I'm getting good at lying! Kurenai looked at me funny.

"Dandelions are weeds. If you would've given them to someone, they'd hate you! It looked like you were going to give them to someone the way you were carrying them so proudly!" Kurenai plucked the flowers from my hand and threw in a nearby trash can. "There. Alright, I'll see you around." She went right past me.

"Yeah…bye." I'm so smart, look at me, giving weeds to Anko! I don't even know why I'm giving her anything, but oh well. My intuition has been really fucked up lately, as I'm sure you can tell. I was probably blushing at that time.

Now I have nothing to give to Anko. No flowers, not even a petal…there was that last option…I could plant one on the cheek…heheh-- NO! That's violating her! Then again, she has touched me several times too. Without _my_ permission. And I have nothing else to give, so…pssh, how hard can it be, right? She's Anko, not Shizune. Anko's brave, it won't hurt.

I stun myself. The things I do are so retarded. If I do give her a kiss--more like a peck-- everyone will know within twenty minutes. When I do, IF I do, I'll have to make sure that Kiba kid isn't around. He's the source of outgoing and incoming rumors. I haven't even walked into the main building and here I am, heart punching and kicking my chest and the reindeers attacking unrelentingly. I put a sweaty palm to my cheek, which was equally warm and pasty. I could just turn around and call in sick or I could face it and tell her I have nothing for her. Hmm…intuition says to kiss her, common sense says to run. Whatever, I'll go with intuition today. My common sense can go screw itself. Last time I took its advice I ended receiving punishment from Tsunade. Then I remembered the kiss wasn't going to float from my lips. I had to give it to her.

I moved my lead legs forward and managed to make it up to the very floor of Tsunade's office. I could hear Anko and her friends talking excitedly, and each squeal from them made the reindeers surge in power and my heart was beginning to thrash. I still think I have heart problems, but I'm not visiting any doctors until I'm absolutely forced to…even then, I don't think I'll take any chances, so I'll probably go to young, non-senile, doctor. Right now, I'm standing against the wall, debating on going in or not. Now I'm beginning to feel nauseous, and I think I'm shaking. I don't even know for sure if I really am so tremulous. I'm numb with fear, and all that's going on in my body, from spastic reindeer to earthquake plagued hearts, has taken my senses, so all I think and see is Anko. I took a deep breath, swallowed my nausea and stepped in.

Anko, though surrounded by people, primarily women, waved at me. I smiled and walked in, ignoring all of their stares, and joined the group. I was about to do something social, but then I saw Anko, and my senses froze over. She was so beautiful. Anko was dressed up because it was her birthday, and she had a light brush of make up, and make up or not, she was beautiful. She was wearing a nice, sharp brown coat over a deep, autumn-ish, purple sweater and had khaki pants on. So romantic, yet lovely and young. She was only twenty five, as of today. I felt a thick blush creep across my face, and the reindeers were threatening to rip me apart; if my heart hadn't exploded already, I didn't care. My senses failed me because of looking at Anko. How was I going to live with her as my partner if this kept happening? I swear, my life just gets more and more complicated and surreal. Will this ever change?

Anko told her friends to leave, and they emptied the room to go work and do other things. Anko looked at me and grinned. She ran up to me and hugged me. Somehow, I relaxed, and I sigh flew from me. "Happy birthday, Anko." I managed to say. My throat closed up to prevent the reindeer from making me scream. My nausea wavered, and disappeared. So I have a little bit of anxiety. For Anko. No problem, I'm not in love…not in love and never will be… Anko took my hand and squeezed it. I squeezed faintly back.

"Thanks, Genma. How did you know, though? I don't remember telling you."

"Oh, a little robin told me this morning. I don't have anything for you…I'm so sorry." I couldn't take any chances. Anko shrugged, and smiled softly.

"No prob--"

"No, I do actually. Come over here for a sec…" Life was made for retarded, opaque risks, and right now, I needed to take one…it would determine my social status, but I didn't care right now. I took Anko's hand and ran up to the top of the building, where you could see the whole city of Konoha. It was cold, but I was burning up, and the wind that came blew Anko's hair into her face. Pulling her close to me, combing her hair out of her face and holding it back, I stared into the sweet eyes for a second. "Anko, keep this a secret. Don't tell anyone."

"Okay."

I had never kissed a girl before. Ever. This was the closest I'd ever been to a person of the opposite gender. My heart's pound slowed down and I felt my mind relax, and my muscles released anxiety off into my bloodstream. Here it was. The risk. Whether my life flashed before my eyes as I bent down slightly, I'll never know, but when my lips touched hers I nearly fainted. So soft, so sweet. The reindeers diminished to steady hum and my senses returned to full blast. And I melted away and nearly flew in with the wind when Anko didn't pull back from me, but held me tighter with her. Anko held me by the shoulders, and when her arms slid down mine to her sides, I pulled back gently. How many seconds? Did it reach a minute? Nah, of course not. I'd say…five seconds. At least. But those were the best seconds of my life, for sure. Anko looked up at me, and I must've been blushing furiously or something because she giggled and leaned on me.

"Thanks for the surprise. I'll treasure it." I smiled and put an around her waist.

"You're welcome." I wasn't going to add that I probably enjoyed it more than she did.

Why is it when you're always relaxed something has to happen to make you spazz? I was reminded that Anko's my partner. I'm not supposed to have feelings for her. Not that I-- Oh, screw this. I'll only admit it to myself this time.

I really am I falling in love with Anko Mitarashi.

OKAY! Chapter 4 might take a bit longer. I need to get ideas. I already have a few, but I'm trying do decide how it should work! **REVIEW !** I need to know people read this. Anonymous reviews welcome! Keep reading!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Same Old

I don't own Naruto. If I did, though, Sakura would've died a bloody, mangled death long ago. She is unnecessary and useless to the show's benefit.

What have I done?

I just kissed Anko. My partner. Why did I do that again? Oh, right, it was her birthday and I, the total dumb ass was about to give her dandelions. However, I don't plan to tell Anko or anyone else that.

I kept replaying the kiss in my head. It was like a seven year old watching a video. They see something funny, and they'll replay it many times, but you'll get the same reaction from them: laughter. Then the parents get annoyed and they make the kid move on in the video. But no one can tell _me_ to stop. I smiled to my myself as the same kiss happened over and over again in my mind. Anko took my hand. "Genma. That was…nice." Anko laughed. "Who knew?" I put a finger to her lips.

"No one will ever know, about this, okay?"

"Right." she said solemnly. I smiled at her. The gay reindeers stopped, and now my heart was beating at a slow speed, like I was in a dream. But I'm not. I really did kiss her. Which shocks me. A lot. But I'm also proud of myself. That won't last long though. I feel my happiness waning because I sense something. Someone. Behind us. I let go of Anko's hand and turned around. Who? Kiba? Ino? I heard a faint cough.

"Um, are you…done?" I sighed. It was only Hayate. He's good at keeping secrets and prying them out of him is impossible. Anko and I blushed, but he smiled faintly. And coughed.

"Oh, uh, yeah." Anko replied, and walked past him quickly. I stayed behind and whispered to him, "Let this out and I'll kick your ass, got it?"

"Yeah, don't worry. Good luck with her."

I smiled and took off with Anko.

Tsunade was in her office…? "Weren't you in Hawaii?" I asked, grimacing. Tsunade looked mildly surprised.

"No." she replied. Okay, so where did I hear-- oh. I dreamt it. Silly me. She looked at us studiously. "You two look…flustered. Anything happen while I was gone?"

"Yes, and--"

I quickly and discreetly reached behind Anko and pinched her thigh. She sucked in her breath and shot me a thankful look. "No! Of course not, I mean, pssh, what--" I pinched her harder this time. "Nothing happened." she finished. Tsunade gave us a frown."…anyway. Go deliver these documents to the ANBU headquarters, Genma. Anko, get these books to Konoha's library. Snappy, too."

"Fine." I took the heavy, tall stack of documents and lumbered out of the room, into the sun. I was just glad Tsunade didn't give us the third degree.

The streets were quite busy. It was only nine or so, to my dismay. After noon, I'm fine. I am easily tolerated, and I actually have energy. Since when does it take so long for the effects of coffee to kick in? Geez, six hours is ridiculous to wait. So, as a result, my energy was low, even though I was walking quickly. I looked almost paranoid, but hey, when you have forty pounds of Tsunade's shit in your arms, pulling your shoulders down, it makes anyone look paranoid and possessed. But I was actually really, really relaxed. Hopefully the reindeer were gone for good. Hopefully, unlikely, but hopefully.

So I've admitted it. I am in love with Anko. But she will never know, and neither will anyone else. Kind of like my "pajama" secret but…less embarrassing. Obviously. Let's see…it's Wednesday. So…that means that tomorrow or today, with Tsunade, it's unpredictable, we'll decide at who's house the Halloween party will be.

I know what you're thinking.

No, we aren't little immature imps. But adults have to have their own fun too. Besides, our parties have alcohol and "more mature" themes tied into them. They're more fun than kiddie parties, no doubt about it. How much should we bet my house is chosen? It'll happen. I know it. My life works that way. I may sound pessimistic, but seriously, that's how I live. I live to expect the worst after past experiences…that have happened repetitively.

Damn it. These papers-- or dictionaries, more like it-- are starting to take a toll on me. I think, I'm not sure, but with my luck I'm close to being sure I dislocated my shoulder. GREAT. See? I live for the worst! Told you. I'm never wrong anymore. …actually, I'm wrong most of the time, but for some things I'm ALWAYS right. Hey, I wonder how Anko's-- What the hell am I doing? I can't let her take over my life like this. I need to think of…useful things. Not saying Anko isn't useful-- Oh, you know exactly what I mean! Uh, let's see, useful things…how about those computers--oh screw this, Anko it is then. I let her take my mind to heaven

When I finally got to the ANBU headquarters, heck, I hadn't even passed the gates yet when I was greeted oh so cordially. "What do you want why are you here answer me you have ten seconds before we kill you." I had the papers pulled out of my hands and I had someone holding my arms behind my back. Man, the ANBU stretches you out good! I had something wrapped around my legs and they stuffed a sock in my mouth or something…but the sock was decorated with little hearts and butterflies. That made me laugh at the sap that wore this gay thing. I spit it out.

"The Fifth ordered me to give you some crap, so here it is. Can I go?" I replied.

Yuugao, Hayate's girlfriend took up the papers without effort.

"Good. Go." The ANBU kicked me out. Literally. Some guy started to kick my ankles until I was "fifteen feet out of the vicinity". The ANBU, personally, are pricks. Bitches, too, but Yuugao is only nice out of her uniform…and she's Hayate's girlfriend.

Hayate's girlfriend. His girlfriend is Yuugao.

How come I don't have a girlfriend?

Hayate is a scrawny, weak midget. How did he get such a babe like Yuugao? I, on the contrary, am over six feet tall and I'm NOT scrawny. Muscular. Not scrawny, and I'm no weakling either. To make things more retarded, Yuugao is his height and is more muscular and WAY healthier than him!

And, why, why the hell am I single? Oh, for the record, Hayate is coughing all year, 24/7. He has like, chronic cough. Or something like that. I wish it was terminal for him. Terminal something. Pneumonia, asthma, I don't know or care. But he's sick in the summer as much as in the winter. The last time I was sick was…six months ago or so. And that was only allergies. Hayate here, is coughing his weak little bronchus out and he gets a girlfriend. Oh, yeah, they've been together for like, two damned years! Why haven't they broken up yet? Hello?! Relationships don't last that long! Common knowledge. I'm not jealous. So don't go thinking I'm jealous 'cause I'm not, Nope. I don't hate Hayate either.

That was a waste of my time. Even Kakashi can make better use of his time than what I've done all day! Delivering papers, doing errands, signing paperwork and all this office stuff that I'm not supposed to be doing. I didn't get to do it with Anko either, but with Hayate. Yuugao's boyfriend. I haven't been on a decent, bloody, risky mission since I went off to go take down the sound four with Raidou…eight months ago, too. So, I haven't really left Konoha in more than half a year. Wow. Other people, like Kakashi and Asuma, are always doing stuff! …well, maybe it's because they have students. I hate kids. Okay, I don't _hate _kids. Just teenagers. And that's what they teach, so until I learn to tolerate teens I'm not even going to think of that. But…Aoba and Raidou don't have their squad either, but they've been on the fun missions. Blood, all that good stuff. I haven't seen blood since I was in the hospital from that mission of the sound four. And that's a long time without seeing the familiar red liquid. I'm not a bloodthirsty loser, by the way. But I'm trying to make a point here, most missions come with blood.

I opened up my fridge. Until I saw the blankness of it all, I had never noticed the lacking food. All I had was some old bread and mayo. The rest was either expired…or…unappetizing because of a certain natural change. Whatever. Mayo sandwich with tap water. For dinner. AGAIN. Smothering the bread with the thick mayo, which I noted had a sharper scent to it, I began to wonder when the last time was I paid the supermarket a visit. Months. I don't know, but if didn't go tomorrow, I'd probably die of malnourishment. Ah, well. Mayo sandwiches aren't _that _bad. I took a bite and spit it out immediately. The mayo was, well, it tasted like shit. I nearly threw up the emptiness of my stomach, it tasted so bad. I scraped my tongue with my toothbrush and tried to get the taste out if my mouth. No dinner for me.

OH! I got paid today. A good two thousand dollars…wow. I'd need about five hundred for the food, but hey, that's plenty. Plenty enough for more than a dinner. A real dinner, with Anko. NO! No, not yet. We need to get to know each other more. Besides, no one can find this out or…I don't want to think of it. I'm too tired because lack of nutrients, and the thought makes me more nauseous. Damn mayonnaise. It tasted fine yesterday!

I changed into my new "pajamas"--heheh--and slipped under the covers. So cold and stiff. Ugh. It would all change soon enough. Once I got accommodated. I did forget one thing. The lights. They were on. According to Asuma and Kakashi, I sleep in total apocalyptical darkness. And for that reason, Asuma thinks I have relations with the Antichrist. It's not that dark. I mean, the curtains are taped together and they have a special anti-sun layer and--I value my sleep, thank you very much. Five minutes into the sheets had me falling asleep. I was feeling fine, despite my hunger, but another feeling came when I heard a rasping snicker and the rustle of clothing in front of my bed.

This is it. I really think I'm going to die here.

Oh, people! Those of you who have me on their author alert/favorites list I give you a BIG, FAT thank you! If you can, please review for each chapter!

Heheh. I got some slight writer's block here, but I have the next chapter planned out. Sorta. Whatever. **REVIEW! ANONYMOUS OR NOT, REVIEW!**


	5. Chapter 5

-1Chapter 5: Forget It

I don't own Naruto. You don't either, unless you're Masashi Kishimoto, and I highly doubt you are.

I swallowed past the air trapped in my throat. I heard my heart in my ears, pounding quickly into my eardrums. Oh, shit. I'm going to die in my own bed. I felt something in the air reaching toward me, though I couldn't prove it. I shot up and gasped when I found my eyes met with an enticing, lovely pair of eyes. Such a nice green, and very hypnotic. I was too scared t say anything, so I just stared at what was in front of me steadily.

Words of Wisdom: carry kunai while you sleep in your clothes.

A weird ass snicker followed the long stare. "Are you…Genma Shiranui?" A thick numbing sensation was dispersed throughout my veins. The blood froze in them and goosebumps rose on my skin. The sound of the voice caused the reaction. Not the fact _it_ knew my name, but the chilly rasp of it.

Times like these don't come often. My life lays on one word. Instant death will come at the utterance of what I chose. Intuition and conscience fought bitterly in my mind, but something else came joined the fight. Anko? What was she doing in my mind? Oh, right, I'm in love, I'm constantly thinking about her. But the image I had of her was different. She looked sad and was mouthing silence. My eyes flew down to the kunai holster strapped around my right leg. But just in case, no sudden movements. I had to answer the question. How? Well, here goes another opaque risk. Suicide, here I come!

"I'm…" Who do I hate? DAMMIT! I hate a lot of people, but why can't I think of them? UGH! SCREW THIS! "I'm Gai Maito! The power of youth compels you!" I smiled my best imitation of Gai, but I sounded like a nun. The eyes seemed to frown.

"Oh? I'm sure you're Genma. Let's see, shall we?" I prepared myself for genjutsu, but not a cool hand taking some of my hair and sniffing it. _Sniffing it. _I did feel something flick the side of my face.And that's where I lost it.

"Fuck you!" I slapped the hand away, but it was too late.

"You're Genma, alright. Snappy, but the scent gives it away." the voice said.

Okay, so, I'm being raped by an Inuzuka? What's with the sniff thing? Or…shit. This is isn't an Inuzuka, it's…I turned on the light to make sure I was right.

A white hand was raised as the lights were turned on. Black hair fell over the shoulders. My heart stopped. Orochimaru. He was here, right in my apartment. Holy Crap. I'm screwed. What did he want with me?

"What do you want with me?" I demanded. Orochimaru smirked.

"It seems you and Anko have something going on. Am I right?"

I blinked like some idiot.

"No. Why?"

"I was going to make her life living hell using you," he replied.

"What do you want with Anko?" I asked.

"We have personal issues with each other. And I was going to use her boyfriend, but since you're not her boyfriend, well, I can't do anything."

"Yeah. I don't even know who this Anko is," I lied. Lying gets easier the more I do it. Orochimaru shrugged.

"Whatever. I know where she lives, so I'll just make her life living hell directly." The reindeers which I thought were dead sprang up to life, and went around furiously. But…the prancy-ness wasn't prancy-ness anymore. It was more like fire. But with guns. And other pimping crap I couldn't describe. I jumped up out of bed.

"I won't let you," I said, holding kunai in both hands. Well. Suicide. This bastard, Orochimaru has killed tons of people. I suppose I'm here to make a ton and a half. Why do the ninja instincts have to come in now? I don't want to die…yet. Oh, well. Here goes another opaque risk, but, what type of honor is it to die in your own house? Orochimaru turned around.

"Oh, little noble ninja, how sweet." he said. I smiled.

"No. Any ninja would do this!"

And right there, started the fight. I was freaking scared. This guy was going to pull something any minute. And with my lack of food, I was noticing my moves were way slower, and I think I was losing the sugar in my blood.

"Hm. You're pretty good. Not good enough though." I remembered the ANBU. Kicking my ankles was pretty aimless, but it might be helpful here. And, so, here I go, attack of the idiot. I knocked him off his feet, but then I felt something stab my upper arm. I looked and gasped. I had just been _bitten _by him. On my shoulder, there were two little red holes now. Orochimaru stood and grinned. Ugh. So creepy! "You know, that was poison." Well, shit, I'm screwed. While he caught off guard examining the little hole, I felt something press my diaphragm quickly and hard, sending the air, and some blood, out of me. He cackled and took off.

I just laid there. No breath or energy, and where he had punched me there was a sort of pulsating feeling. Well, I'm going to die. The poison is spreading. My heart is speeding up, and I'm starting to sweat. I started to lose feeling in my hands, and my vision was darkening. I couldn't go on. I guess this is where I meet my end. Well, that's how it works for ninjas. As my grip on consciousness slipped out of my firm grasp, the last thing I thought was Anko. I wish I could've said a goodbye.

I think I'm dead. Seriously. Am I in heaven or hell? Or…am I…? I forced my eyes open. Oh. I'm alive. Dang! I mean, uh, woohoo. I was looking up at a ceiling fan whizzing gently overhead. The windows were open, I heard birds and a breeze, but most of all, the room smelled delicious and nature-y. So I'm alive after all. Alive, but famished. I didn't eat last night, but still. I shouldn't be this hungry. And, hold on a sec…I'm not in my apartment. I'm in a house. I'm sleeping on a plushy big bed, and the room and nice, modern, decorations. Was I kidnapped and raped? After what I learned about me being in "high demand" I've been somewhat paranoid.

I examined my clothes. I wasn't wearing the jacket, but everything else, the under shirt, was there. I was missing my headband, but that was at home. I knew only that much. I came out from under the sheets and onto really soft carpet. This was weird. How the HECK did get here? I'm not dreaming, by the way, because I've already pinched myself. Several times, actually.

I meticulously stepped into a nice hallway and came out into the foyer. Nice. Very sleek. Then I heard voices from one area, and I turned into a fancy kitchen. I saw Yuugao at the table with Hayate by her side. Hayate saw me and smiled.

"Hey. You're finally awake." I frowned.

"Who's house is this?" I asked.

"Mine." replied Hayate. "It will be Yuugao's soon, too."

"Eh? Are you…"

Hayate beckoned me over and pulled Yuugao's hand from her lap gently. On one finger, there was a golden circlet with a tiny diamond crowning it. I stared. So, Yuugao, isn't his girlfriend, but his…fiancée.

So…that explains the double bed…

"We're getting married in a month." Yuugao stated proudly.

"Congrats, but, uh, Hayate, are you rich or something? This place is, well, really nice. I like it a lot." I said. Hayate cocked his head.

"I'm not rich, but I inherited this house form my brother…who was rich. Actually, I inherited everything after he died, so, that explains my house." replied Hayate. "Oh, sit down, your waffles are right here." He added. Waffles? Sheesh. I haven't had those since…god knows when. I sat down and stared at what was in front of me. They were waffles, but topped with strawberries and blueberries. YUM! Before I stuffed my face, I asked one more question.

"Hey, how did I end up here? I was in my house last time I checked." Yuugao and him exchanged glances. And smiles.

"Well," he began, "Tsunade needed us immediately late Wednesday night, so I came by to get you. I went in because there was no answer, and I saw you on the floor, clutching your stomach. My first thought was that you had eaten something bad and passed out, but then I saw you were breathing. I also saw where you got poisoned, and when I saw it, the whole arm was…" Hayate made a face. "It looked gangrenous." I cringed at the thought I might've had no arm if it wasn't for him. "So, I took you to hospital, but on the way, Tsunade stopped me and asked about you. Then she ordered me to put you on the ground while she did something. She said it was to extract any poison from you. And then she said something else and looked scared, but I couldn't hear what she had because she said it so low. But she commanded me to take you home. So I did. And now you wake up two days later." He finished. That explains my hunger.

"No physical activity for you, either. At least for a week." added Yuugao. I didn't realize how badly my diaphragm hurt until she said the part about no physical activity. I couldn't laugh. Or sigh. It hurt too much.

"And…you let me take your bed, why?" I said, raising a fork piled high with waffle and fruit. Hayate scowled.

"Isn't that what any normal person would do? Poisoning is very serious. Besides, the guest bed doesn't suck at all." he replied. I smiled and shook my head.

"Well, thanks a lot. I owe you." Hayate was about to contradict me, but Yuugao cut him off.

"How come you didn't know about our engagement earlier? We're been engaged for a month or so." Yuugao asked me.

"Why? Well, Kiba doesn't know, that's why!" Hayate answered. Yuugao shrugged and leaned back in her chair. "Oh yeah…" Hayate looked around and said in a quiet voice. "Were you really kissing Anko the other day? Don't worry, Yuugao won't tell either." I leaned in and smiled.

"It was her birthday, and I had nothing to give her, so…but I noticed that I had been feeling strangely around her for a while. We've known each other for over a year, but we went from acquaintances to enemies and now…in this awkward state--"

"Love." Yuugao said a-matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, well, whatever, but it's not love." I contradicted. They don't need to know I'm in love with her…YET.

After I finished my breakfast, I left to go buy food for _my _house. I really, really, absolutely detest shopping, though. Who doesn't? Girls, maybe. But I don't understand them anymore than I do waking up early. I pushed the cart around tossing foods into it. Foods that aren't expired, and taste good. Now I won't die or starvation and malnourishment--Yay. After I bought everything, totaling in two full carts and three hundred fifty dollars, I returned to my apartment. It was half past one, so I decided to go visit Anko. I went into Tsunade's office, which clean and aired out. Her back was turned to the door, so I think she was looking out the window. "Ahem." Tsunade turned around.

"Genma, hi. Sit for a minute, why don't you?"

"I'll stand, thank you." I said stiffly. Tsunade shrugged and took her chair

"Well. I'll make this quick, but the poison we found in you was snake poison."

"Obviously," I scoffed, massaging the bite. Tsunade winced.

"Well…it was Oro--"

"Yeah, I know. He said he was after Anko… that means-- Where's Anko?" I demanded. Oh, please, no. Don't tell me…

"She's fine," Tsunade said hastily. "I think…" she added under her breath.

"What do you mean 'I think?'" I said forcefully. "Where the hell is she?"

"She's running an errand for me, relax, Genma. But…I'm concerned for her. Do you know what Orochimaru intended to do her?" I let go of my tightened muscles and took a seat.

"Well, he said he was going to make her life living hell using me--"

"Why using you?" she interrupted.

"Let me finish!"

"Sorry. Keep going, don't let me inter--"

"Tsunade." I reminded her.

"Right! Go ahead!"

"Anyway," I began, "I don't know that part," I do know, but she won't. "But she's in danger. Did anything happen between her and Orochimaru a while back?" Tsunade nodded.

"Quite a few actually. I'm not going to tell the story. It's confidential. Ask her, in other words. But it looks like he's up to something again. Damn it." she said.

"Well, I know the whole Sasuke thing a while back, but what do you think he's planning now? Fraternity of rapists?" I asked, half joking. HALF JOKING. That guy, I swear, wanted Sasuke for rape, but I guess we'll never know. Tsunade didn't find it funny. "Anyway, what would he want with Anko?" Tsunade smiled. Sweetly, too. Which is fairly scary, coming from her.

"Anko isn't like most females. I'm sure you've noticed that." No duh. "She's stronger than most, in a sense, but I don't think she's prepared for what Orochimaru is thinking of. It's worrisome."

"Duh." I mumbled. "So, what do you want me to do about it?"

"I was asking you questions about what Orochimaru said to you. That way we'd at least have an idea of when and how he plans to strike."

"So, Anko can lock her door."

"Your door was locked, was it not, dear Genma?"

"True. Mine had the deadbolt and everything." I wonder how Oro did get into my place? Seems a bit impossible, no?

"Exactly. So, we need to keep a close watch on the area--"

"I'm on it--"

"No, no! I have Raidou and Aoba for the gates. You, however, get a special mission." Mission, eh? Good. It's about time, but I don't think I should complain right now. Tsunade leaned forward.

"You get to keep a close watch on Anko. Don't leave her alone. You've got sharper senses than all the other ninjas." I do? Hm, I thought I was dead as a doornail when it came to that. "Can you do that for me?" she implored.

"Well, what's so important about Anko that I need to hold her hand?" I can't let anything slip from me. Tsunade grinned malignantly.

"I don't think you want your dearest Anko in the hands of a villain. The same one that came into you house and left you this." Tsunade reached over and pulled my shirt up. I sucked in my breath. Where I had been punched, laid a big black bruise. I'm talking big and nasty. It was like a rainbow, but disgusting and painful. Tsunade looked at it. "You're lucky he didn't do anything else to you." she said. "Or else, you probably would've been dead." she sighed. "And, Anko, along with Kurenai and Yuugao, is one of the strongest females in the village. If Orochimaru gets him filthy hands on her, think. She has capacity to do many things, good and bad. If he manipulates her, what would he make her do? A lot of shit, that's what. We don't need that. Since Orochimaru, in a way, is her weakness, she's easier to control than Yuugao or Kurenai. So, Genma, will you watch her?"

"I guess." I replied. Perfect. I get to know Anko better. I stood up to leave.

"Oh, Genma?"

"Yeah?"

"This is an S-rank mission. Take care of Anko with your life."

An S-rank mission, holy crap. That's the highest missions go. I wouldn't call myself and elite ninja, but I guess I am considering the fact I was just assigned this. If I'm supposed to be recovering, then why am I doing this mission? Whatever Oro is planning, I don't think it will be fun.

Ooh. Now Oro's in the mix. What'll happen? Keep reading. **REVIEW! **

**OH! THANKS TO THOSE OF YOU WHO KEEP REVIEWING! I 3 YOU! JK…sorta… **


	6. Chapter 6

-1Chapter 6: Decisions, Decisions

You don't own Naruto and neither do I.

This is going to fun! I get to watch Anko and hang with her 24/7! Almost, but hey, don't kill my euphoria. It'll probably kill itself, but ANYWAY. Tsunade said Anko was doing something in the ninja academy, and I found her there gathering papers in the office.

"Hey!" she looked up and smiled.

"Hi! How are you feeling?"

"Okay, I guess. I get to hang out with you!" I said.

"Nice. I'm getting some documents and taking them back to Tsunade." Anko said, taking and stack and coming out of the office. It was a small stack, compared to what I was carrying a few days back. We went out into the afternoon light and went on talking. The reindeers, however, maintained a deliciously warm hum deep inside me. We talked about the upcoming Halloween party, and it was then she mentioned her house had been chosen as the site of the party.

"Really?" I said.

"Yup! I can't wait, I already have an idea!"

"What are you planning?"

"Scaring the heck out of Asuma and Kurenai." she said slyly. I looked at her blankly.

"May I ask why?"

"Oh!" Anko made a flourish with her hand. "Everyone knows they're not coming to the party because they'll be "busy" with their own things! So, we can give them a good wake up call!" she replied.

"What's the point? It's not like they're going-- Ohhh…I get it! But still, let's have it as an alcohol party this year!" I suggested.

"Again? Okay! I like beer, anyway. Sake is good too. But--"

"Asuma and Kurenai will probably come if there's alcohol involved." I pointed out. Those two like alcoholic drinks…particularly Kurenai. Anko thought for a minute.

"True. But it's impossible to make Kurenai drunk. She drank four bottles of beer last year and she left the place walking upright and dragging Asuma along. He, on the other hand, is super easy to make drunk! So, should we have vodka too, then? Vodkatini! Yeah, I'll decorate it to look Halloween-ish!" Anko said excitedly. I shrugged.

"Sure. Sounds great. Should we do some genin scaring, too?"

"Hm…after we get drunk. That'll scare them more. When they try to TP the house, we can scare them away!" she said.

"Won't we get arrested?" I asked. Anko raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

"Ah, well. It won't matter. Besides, we'll hung over the next day!" she said it like being hung over didn't include laying in bed sweating and groaning all day.

"Yes, yes." I agreed. "Sounds great. I'll be there for sure."

"YEAH! I freaking can't wait for this shit to start!" she almost screamed that…

"…That sounded really ghetto!" I teased. Anko is so cool.

"I know!" she squealed.

After running a few more errands, we got to chill out. We talked more. I never got bored, even the silence after Tsunade ordered us to work. I was put in a good mood because of Anko! She's so AWESOME! Let me rave about her for a sec, here. Anko never runs out of things to talk about, she's damn funny, and she can actually tolerate, or, she makes me tolerable. She's really pretty, and I love listening to her stories. Wow, this mission is really beneficial to my health!

I got to my house after having ramen with Anko. Not as a date but as…something that was friendly…and not date-y. I dropped her off at her place and then returned to my apartment. It was nice to be home after a long and fun day. Hopefully tomorrow will be similar. Except for one thing.

What is it with girls and touching my hair? Did I give them permission to? NO! So why do women take parts of my hair and start swooning about "How delicious it is" and "how soft it is" and sometimes they don't even give an explanation to why my hair is laced through their fingers. I hate that. Anko does it to me. So does Tsunade. Every. Fucking. Day. Of. My. Life. Kurenai used to do it when we were younger, but the she decided to mess with her own. Hm. I'll have to find out if she plays with Asuma's hair. I also wonder if he actually likes it. It's another of the many things I hate. Whatever they see in my hair, it's found attractive or something. I see nothing so enticing about it, but whatever. They're girls. Maybe it's the color. I've been accused of being blond. It's a very light brown, people, SEE THE DIFFERENCE! Whatever it is, it's not blond. Nor will it ever be. The next person to harass me will face consequences.

When I arrived at Tsunade's office, the place was a total mess. I was shocked and I suddenly wanted to return home. I approached her desk reluctantly. Tsunade saw me and smiled faintly. "No tasks for you. But that _special _one, okay?" she winked. I turned to go. "Oh, wait Genma!"

"Huh?"

Tsunade leaned over and took strands of my hair. She ran them through her fingers and grinned. She let go, and shooed me off. Because she's the Hokage, just because she's the Hokage, I didn't kill her. What is her--all women's-- deal? They always go for the right side of my head. I suppose that'll be on of Earth's many wonders…one of life's wonders, too. I sighed and went to go look for Anko.

I walked around in circles around the main building. Quickest, and easiest way to find her. Well, maybe not quickest, but I'm too lazy to make anymore effort. As I was walking around, perfectly relaxed, I nearly died of heart failure when I felt a tug on my head. I thought I was going to die, but I only staggered back and whirled around. I saw…the most horrible thing behind me. One, two, three, four, girls behind me. I was staring at, because of bent position as a result of the pulling on my hair, at…uh, her name escapes me…I was her proctor-- Oh! Temari, of course. Temari pulled harder and twirled the hair around her finger. The others, behind her, grinned and giggled. From this day on, I swore to be, when the time comes, the strictest, meanest, rudest proctor possible. At least with the teens. I'm always surly like that, but I'll make myself odious. "Why, pray tell, are you messing with my hair?" I said in low voice. Temari shrugged.

"I dunno. They dared me too." she replied. The other giggled in unison.

"WHY?" I pressed. Uh-oh. I feel something rising in me…crazy possessed guy with a stick in his mouth, they asked, they get.

Temari indicated the girls with her thumb. "It's supposed to be soft. According to everyone else." I jerked my hair from her hand. Damn. That was painful!

"Well, quit it. Go f--" If I say that to these kids, their parents will probably sue me for verbal abuse. Or something retarded like that. But, as an adult, I do know one thing. Discipline. It's a natural thing, not saying I'm good at it, but oh well. "Do you that's a total invasion of privacy? How would you like it if I did this to you?" I took her hair and pulled like she had done.

"OW!" she shrieked.

"Exactly," I said, "It's totally disrespectful." Burn in hell. All of you. HAHAHAHA! "And annoying when every girl does it to you…" I mumbled. Temari raised an eyebrow in amusement.

"Can I touch it?" asked some pink haired girl. What a bitch. Little high voice…

"No."

"Can I?" asked a blondie. What a sluttish imp. Do these little bitches not know what the term no means? Meh, I'll try something else.

"Denied."

Then that little Hyuuga midget, imp #2, that's what I'll call her. Her name I don't know. I just know it's something Hyuuga. But anyway, she jumped up and took a tuft of hair, and if I'm not hallucinating, she _sniffed _it. SNIFFED it. As in inhale of air to take in scent. Make her whore #1, bitch #3.

"What in bloody hell did I just say?" that I screamed. She giggled.

"You said not to do that," she replied rocking back on her heels.

"So why did you do it?"

" 'Cause." she replied. " 'Cause?" Seriously. That's all she can give me? Wow, I seriously wonder who her parents were to create a total dumb ass. I wouldn't have given such a stupid answer…but THAT'S BECAUSE I WOULDN'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN WHY I WAS MESSING WITH A GUY'S HAIR SHE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW! I have made it official, as of today, to make teen's lives hell. Whenever I can.

"Well, go to hell." I regretted that.

"Would you come with me then?" piped some brown haired girl. She was pretty cute.

"No." I said. "Now, I'm busy, so go away, off you go."

"Hey, Hayate, I'll make--" started Temari.

"I'm _Genma._" I said emphatically. Temari scowled.

"Oh. Sorry. Anyway, I'll make a deal with you. Let us mess with your hair, and we won't stalk you day and night." Let's see…hormone possessed whores/bitches/sluts/failures after me or ten seconds of torture? Ten seconds of torture it is then. I sighed.

"Fine." at once, they squealed and attacked me. I counted…one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine--

"Ten. Now get off me." I gingerly pushed them off and stalked away.

"Thank you! It was so soft and delicious!" screamed the Hyuuga whore.

"I love you!" yelled the brown haired one.

"I going to remember the luscious, thickness of each strand for the rest of my life!" that blonde added, waving me away sweetly.

"Shakespeare will hear about this! You've been blessed with perfect hair." miss pink said after me. Wait, what? Oh…I get it. She's going to write a poem about my hair. That's really, really messed up. Is it really so nice? Ah, well, don't know or care.

"Your girlfriend will be lucky!" Temari added. I cringed.

"Whatever," I returned, going into the building. As the door closed behind me, I heard them swoon in perfect unison. Teenagers.

I FINALLY found Anko in the copy room…sitting on the copier. "What are you doing?" I asked incredulously. She smiled.

"Having fun. Check it!" from the paper, she pulled a paper with what looked like a blob of dried blood on it. But in black ink and rather large…

"What is it? Blood? Jell-o blob but on paper?"

"Nah. I made copies of my butt!" she said proudly. I stifled a laugh. Wow. I did that when I was eight, and my teacher got mad. It was scary.

"Is there any particular reason you did that?" I asked.

"No." she said shortly, recycling all the papers that had been "marked" by her. "I was bored with my assignment, so I did this instead."

"What was your assignment?"

"To go harass the ANBU about giving us some gay document. Today was the deadline. Want to harass them with me?" she offered. I smirked. Of all things, that would be the nicest right now. I'm going to give the bastard kicking my ankles a piece of my mind.

The two of us took off. When we reached the headquarters, I realized something was wrong. It was missing the guards in front. "Stay here," I commanded to Anko.

"Why?" I'm going against my beliefs, but…

" 'Cause, that's why." Oh, how I absolutely loathe those words.

"Fine," she agreed.

I quietly stepped into the headquarters. The scent of computers and paper hit me, but I saw it was empty. No one was there, not even at the front desk. ANBU always has people there, 24/7. But something caught my eye. On the computer screen there was something. I stared at the word jumping out at me. S-rank emergency, it said, and with other code words I couldn't even begin to understand. There had to be someone here. It wasn't possible. I had never been her before, but I went in some random room behind the receptionist desk. Empty. I tried other hallways, empty as well. No sign of life. Now I was getting nervous. I heard a sudden noise and backed against a wall. It as only the computer. Whew! I read the screen again. Same thing, but further under the big red words read something else. REINFORCEMENTS NEEDED.

I get it. ANBU dispersed everyone. What was so urgent? For all of ANBU to be sent off like that, it must've been something really big. Has this ever happened before?

I was suddenly hit with silence. Not the same silence as before, but more of the silence after a storm, whispering of tornadoes, or the creeping silence after the sharp waters pulling from shore announcing a tsunami.

This was deathly silence.

Want to find out what will happen? Well, read on, and **REVIEW, PLEASE! **

Yeah, if I'm on your author alert list, I expect you to review, not to be mean, but I'm obsessed with reviews, sorry.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Looks on the Future

I don't own Naruto, so get a therapist and get over it.

* * *

The city was silent. I was beginning to feel faint. Something was coming, but what it would be was the problem. Oro? Akatsuki? I stayed still and held my breath.

"Genma, what are you doing here?"

I blinked the vision of my world away and raised my eyes form the computer screen. Ibiki glared at me. Ugh. Do I really have to deal with this right now? I hate this guy! "You're not even part of ANBU, nor do you have any authorization, so why are you here?" he asked.

"Yeah, well, you're not ANBU either." I replied,

"I work in a field similar to them. You on the other hand, are Tsunade's personal slave." That set me off.

"No, I'm not. You hang out with the ANBU because you're a wannabe."

"Excuse me?" Ibiki said, taken aback.

"OH COLD! BURN IBIKI BURN!" announced Anko, striding in. Ibiki sniffed in disapproval. Anko imitated him. But she sniffed longer and louder. Ibiki glared at her. Anko mocked surprise masterfully. "What? I have a cold, Ibiki, is it a sin to be sick?"

"Whatever…" Before he took off, I decided to ask a bit. If he's so into ANBU, he should know where those yuppies are.

"Hey, where the hell is ANBU?" my question was answered by someone else.

"We were called for some large massacre. It was just some stupid kid with a prank…using ketchup for blood, how retarded is that?" answered Yuugao, appearing in the doorway. Anko and Ibiki laughed.

"Oh, that's messed up!" Anko looked at me. "Hey, let's get the documents and leave. Yuugao--"

"OH! Those documents are right here!" Yuugao shoved me aside and opened a drawer of the receptionists' desk and pulled a thick stack of paper. She shoved them in my arms. Why does everyone want to abuse me? The paper is freaking thick, and that would result in insane weight.

"Thanks…now let's go before the other ANBU come!"

"Oh, yeah." we took off. My ankles hurt thinking about the bastard that kicked them. Bruises are the proof. But the crap in my arms hurts more…

"Voila!" Anko dropped the stack of papers on Tsunade's desk. Tsunade nodded and took them, skimming the paper over. At one point, however, she raised her eyes over the paper and looked at me knowingly. That alone made me shiver. What does she know that I don't? Or does she…? No. It simply is not possible. She can't know about Anko and I. We never let it slip out; does she have spies on us? Probably. That woman, I don't know what she smokes, or if she smokes anything, but man, she can see right through me. I suddenly became nervous.

"Ah. Very nice, you two. Oh…one more thing…" Tsunade snickered. I shivered. "Well. Kakashi, Kurenai, Gai, and Asuma, will be, uh, busy, on November first. So, um, you two have to train the teens."

WHAT?! November first was scheduled for my hangover recovery day. I even marked it on my calendar! Besides…Kurenai can train them…she can't get drunk. Or get hungover, for that matter…

"NO!" screamed Anko.

"Yeah, what the hell? November first is…my great-great grandma's one hundred and nineteenth birthday!" I added…lying, of course. Tsunade raised an eyebrow.

"Your great and great-great grandparents are dead, Genm--"

"Well, she's on some sort of drug to--"

"You're doing it whether you like of not!" she thundered, banging a pen on the table.

"FUCK! I get all this shit to do! When can I do something bloody?" Anko hastily put a hand over my mouth. Tsunade stood up.

"What kind of disrespectful, scummy bastard are you?" she said in complete disbelief.

"The kind that is way above you! You're the bottom, you fat slut!" I replied. Tsunade's eyes bugged out.

"EXCUSE ME?" she yelled.

"You heard me! Go rape Jiraiya! He'd enjoy it, and maybe someday you'd be invited to a social event!"

"Genma--" Anko began nervously. "Let's go now."

"Social event? What are you saying?"

"I'm saying everyone hates you! Well, except for the pimps that have raided your body--"

"THAT'S IT!" Anko pulled my arm and dragged me out before Tsunade could maniacally throw a book at us. Once outside, in safety, we spoke.

"What was that all about?" Anko asked me.

"I HATE HER SO MUCH!"

"You can stop screaming…" Oh, right. Stupid me.

"Ugh! I can't explain. All this time I've had shit to do! I need to do something or I'm going to crack!" Anko studied me.

"You already did. Look…how about, since it's almost dinner time, we go out to eat. I think we both need to relax a bit. Even me."

"Okay." I mumbled. Oh, boy. Santa pals are here, spreading their Christmas spirit, aka hell for me. We started to walk around the twilit town.

"What do you like?"

"I don't care-- Oh, you're not paying." I said to her. Anko frowned.

"Why not?"

"I'm going to pay!"

"Why?"

" 'Cause…it's not cool for you to have to pay. You're a…"

"Spit it out," she teased. I forced the words out of my mouth.

"…lady. Not that you're a damsel in distress or anything, but I strictly believe the man should pay. So…I'm paying." I replied reasonably. Anko smirked and decided to cling on my arm.

"Hmm…you're a lot more noble than you look. Thanks, though." Anko said solemnly.

"Anyway, what should we eat?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Oh, right! Almost forgot. How about…" Anko looked around at the lighted signs quickly. "Um…crap! Why don't we just go to my house? I've got a lot of stuff to eat."

"Oh, no, come--"

"I won't go to your house! You've been good enough. Also, with the party, you'll have to know where I live. It's a bit far off though. Kind of out on the outskirts and a bit…old." she said.

"Okay. Sounds nice."

We continued walking until I had no idea where I was. Then, in the distance, I saw a faint light, and like a firefly, it was going on and off in different patterns.

"Oh, dang it! I have to change the light again. Crap." she mumbled. Looking closer in the darkness, I realized that there was a lantern hanging off a torii. And behind the torii…a traditional house. Paper doors, wooden floors, all that. As I walked under the torii, I studied the surroundings excitedly. It was pretty, and I could even hear some crickets left over from the summer. How nice! Where I live, well, let's just say it's shit compared to this…manor, I'll call it. It seemed pretty big so far. I always thought Anko lived somewhere in a box hidden in the alley…don't ask, okay?

"It's so nice!" I exclaimed. Anko slid open a door and beckoned me in.

"Oh, thanks." she flicked on the lights and went somewhere. I followed, and I noticed we were in the kitchen. Anko went about pulling out sushi from the refrigerator.

"I'd love to live in a place like this…" I continued my streak of marveling. Anko met my eyes for a moment, but a moment was enough for the reindeers to spazz.

"Maybe you will, soon." I smiled.

"Yeah-- wait…do you mean…?" Anko shrugged and looked away with a snicker. I blushed and cringed to relieve Rudolph spreading holiday cheer. No…we wouldn't get married. Besides, we don't even have a relationship. The kiss popped into my head. Great, now that has to rub in…the non-truth. I mean, seriously, we argue 24/7. we're just not compatible, right? …are we…?

"So, Genma, what's your favorite thing to drink? Alcohol-wise, I mean." Anko asked me over our sushi. That's a tough question…

"Hm, probably zinfandel or cosmopolitans."

"That's a girly drink!" Anko started to laugh. I smiled.

"Yeah, well, I like it. Martinis are nice too. I don't really care, actually." I replied. Anko nodded.

"I wonder if we can get Kurenai drunk this year? I've wanted to see that for quite a while!"

"Doubt it. The other day, I saw her training her students…with a martini in hand!"

"Oh my god!" exclaimed Anko. "Is she alcoholic?" I shook my head.

"Oh, hell, no. That'd make her…" If she was alcoholic, it would make her the slut she's not, but it would also make her less hot. Even I had the mind to not say that to Anko. "…retarded." I finished after some delay. Anko agreed.

"Let's see…Hayate and Yuugao RSVP'ed. And so did everyone else I invited." she sighed dreamily. "Alcohol is so sexy!" I spit out my food and went into a fit of laughter. I was literally rolling on the ground like some crazed teenager. Anko didn't find in funny and looked over our food across from her where I was losing my mind.

Seriously, how can alcohol be sexy?

"What's so funny?" she asked, folding her arms. My reply was:

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Anko sighed, but then smiled. Getting out of the position she had of tucking her legs under her, Anko crawled over to me. I hadn't improved in mental stability, and she was looking over me with a smirk. I wasn't paying much attention to the smirk, I was gasping for breath in my hysteria. Anko raised her arms. What happened next I couldn't defend myself from. I was laying on back, hands folded over rising and falling stomach. My knees were bent up, and I was rolling from side to side slightly.

I never mentioned the fact Anko has long, flex-y fingers, did I? Well, she does, and that's a scary sight when she writing or typing. The bend to lengths that pain me in thought of that. I'm used to it now, but I wasn't prepared for what she did next.

"Let's find out if Genma is ticklish!"

Oh, shit. I happen to be unnaturally ticklish.

The fingers crawled all over my stomach and sides, causing more insane laughter and loss of oxygen. I couldn't defend myself, her hands were totally ubiquitous, and it was pretty futile to make an attempt. If I didn't have a strong stomach…

Anko was laughing now, too. Laughing at _my _expense. When I managed to roll onto my stomach and curl up into a gasping ball, she gave up…AFTER FIFTEEN MINUTES. Then it struck. I forgot about the diaphragm…it was fine this morning! Well, another reason to kill Oro. I stopped mid breath and stayed like that. I didn't know what pain was until this. Oh my god. I couldn't breathe. At all. The muscles were not working down there, but at the same time a tightening, ebbing force was taking my stomach and contracting it. Now, I'm really sure this is the end. If I don't take a breath soon, as in within theses coming thirty seconds, I'm going to pass out. Anko didn't know what to do, so she flipped out.

"Talk to me!" Anko slapped my face gently. "Wake up!" I held up a hand for her to stop, and she understood, but without more squalling and spazzing.

The little black dots painted my vision about thirty seconds later. I could not scream, not only because I had no breath, but because I was pretty much frozen. The pain suddenly broke and the muscles let go. I took a huge gulp of air and pretty much laid there, Anko holding my hand. I rolled onto my back and took a deep intake of breath until I was at a steady pant.

"What happened?" demanded Anko, rubbing my arm.

"I…the diaphragm…" should I reveal the Orochimaru thing about him coming into my house? I think Tsunade will assassinate me if she finds out. "Was punched a few days back, hard, and…it froze up after all the laughter…"

"Oh! You poor thing." Anko said sympathetically. Last thing to deal with, more pain. It returned to me. I moaned and cringed, folding my hands over my stomach. Ow. OWW. SHIT! It ebbs in variety from searing to dull, and tight to loose. At least I can breathe, now… "Roll onto your stomach."

"Why?" I asked wearily.

" 'Cause." I didn't want to respond to the unclear reason, but I did so anyway. Anko ripped the heavy jacket off of me, leaving the warm undershirt…sweater thingy…

I expected more tickling, but I was wrong. Anko was rubbing my back. Just sweeping a hand back a forth, up and down. "You, rest. I see you're in pain, don't go around hiding it. You hide it well, but relax."

"Whatever…" I returned. From this point on, I was kind of in a stupor. The tatami under me was so cool and smooth, and Anko's hand was putting me to sleep. I looked up at her out of the corner of my eye. She looked really sleepy. On the verge of falling into sleep right there.

That's exactly what happened. Anko slumped slightly, then fell to the ground next to me. So, I'll leave. Anko felt me move. "You're not going anywhere. Stay the night, I don't care. Let me get the blankets."

"I can do it…" I mumbled.

"No…" Anko got up and went off somewhere, but returned momentarily and tossed a heavy blanket on me and a pillow hit my face. "Oh, sorry."

"That's fine." I made myself comfortable and fell asleep with eerie speed. My back tingled where Anko had touched me, and Rudolph just _had _to spread holiday cheer in my dreams.

* * *

That was fun to write! Not that you care, but guess what, I do. And who's the author…?

I think you get the idea!

Anyway, I leave review for you, so leave reviews for me. **PLEASE REVIEW! **

Hey, everyone that reads this, thanks. I like it when people read my compositions.

OH, BY THE WAY! I HAVE CHPT 27 DONE FOR THIS STORY! WANNA READ IT? REVIEW!


	8. Chapter 8

-1Chapter 8:

I don't own Naruto. My birth certificate does not say Masashi Kishimoto. Does yours?

"Hey, Genma, get up."

"Just a bit more…"

I was surprisingly comfortable, despite laying on tatami and tangled in a warm blanket. I curled tighter carefully. All of my abdominals were sore and hurt like hell, but I was comfortable. I pulled the blankets over my head. The door slid open, or closed, I don't know, but I know it did something like that. Footsteps came over to me, and suddenly light forced my eyes open abruptly.

"OWW--shit!"

Anko laughed.

"I told you to wake up!"

"Yeah, well, don't go ripping the covers off like that. It's not cool. Could I have at least ten more minutes?" I heard Anko sigh.

"Fine." she said. "I'll be in my office if you need me."

" 'Kay." I took the blanket from her and plopped back onto the pillow.

"You know what?"

"What?"

"Doesn't it feel…" Anko sat next to me and played around with my hair. I was totally oblivious to it, I was trying to fall asleep anyway. "Like we have some sort of relationship?"

"Uh…I don't know! I mean…um…I guess…"

"Anyway…I'll be in the office."

"Right."

I drifted off to sleep again with Anko's comment in mind. Not possible, right?

I shot up and was greeted by sunlight suggesting lunch time. Why hadn't she woken me up? It was around seven earlier, but now it's eleven or so! I quickly put on my jacket and went off to find her.

"Anko!"

No answer. Well, the house is big, what can I say? I'll look harder. Or maybe she went off without me. Yeah. That's it…

She definitely left without me. I've searched the house thoroughly and even called her cell phone. Anko did not answer. Not a problem. I opened the door to Tsunade's office and walked in casually. Tsunade was talking to Hayate, and both looked at me as I entered.

"Where were you?" asked Tsunade angrily.

"In bed." I replied shortly.

"I told you to be here at eight," she fumed. "You're well over three hours late, Genma!"

"Well, didn't Anko tell--"

"Anko's not here, by the way. Where is she? I'm sure you, of all people, would know." she said sarcastically. What did she say?

"What do you mean Anko's not here? Is she running errands?" Tsunade scoffed.

"She hasn't shown up yet. I have not seen her this morning…" she said.

"Oh my god…" I sank into the nearest chair. Hayate frowned and studied me. And coughed.

" 'Oh my god' what?" he said. Tsunade suddenly gasped.

"Hayate, you have a mission. Go get your ass to the Starbucks and get me coffee!"

"But I--"

"GO!" she screamed. Hayate ran out and shut the door behind him. Tsunade waited a few seconds before doing anything else.

"Explain." This was urgent. I had to spill.

"Okay, yesterday after the fight between you and me, Anko and I decided to go find something to eat so we could relax, but instead we went to her house, and then I stayed the night." I tried to make the explanation brief, for I wanted an answer. Tsunade's mouth dropped and her eyes widened.

"Did you…?" It took me a while to grasp what she meant.

"Oh, hell, no!" I didn't want to explain the tickling… "As we were eating she said something funny…so I started to laugh and then Anko began to tickle me. And, well, the punch Oro gave me fucked up the function of my diaphragm and it froze up after fifteen minutes of laughter. So I was in pain and tired, and she let me stay…" Tsunade smiled at me.

"You like her…!"

"No!" I replied.

"YES!"

"NO!"

"_YES!_"

"Ah, fuck! Are we going to find her or not?" Tsunade dropped her smile and nodded.

"Oh! Yes…do you think Orochimaru did this?"

"For sure!" I replied. My heart began to pound at the realization I might never see her again. Tsunade frowned and nodded going into deep thought. The silence, lasting about three minutes, had changed me. I was shaking, I'm sure of it. Tsunade looked at me.

"You're really pale, you know that?" I began to chew on my toothpick furiously.

"I'm fine. What do we do know?" I stood up. "We have to find her!"

"I know." Tsunade replied quietly. She stood up and faced the window. "Genma…"

"Yes?"

"Don't be mad if I tell you this, but…there's no chance of finding her. If we do find Anko, she'll never be the same. You'd never recognize her."

" 'Scuse me?" I questioned. I hope I heard her wrong. This can't be happening to me! This is crazy! Why did this happen? Oh, crap. I HATE EVERYTHING! UGH! I went up to Tsunade, meaning business. "We're going to find her." I said firmly.

"Genma, it simply isn't possible, okay?" Tsunade returned to normal voice level and folded her arms tightly. "She's gone."

"No, she isn't." I contradicted. Tsunade sighed in total exasperation. "Are you _afraid_? Afraid of Orochimaru?" Tsunade bit her lip.

"You don't know what he can do." she replied. She bit it harder. "We can't get her back…" her voice wavered at the final sentence. I think she's going to cry…

"Well…" I was at a loss for words. "We can try."

"It's useless!" she snapped. I realized her eyes were brimming with tears. "Anko is out of our hands and in Orochimaru's hands, damned by the spirits. If he's gotten a hold of her--"

"I'm going to find her. I don't care what you say." I turned to leave, but she grabbed my shirtsleeve. She sniggered, but at the same time and tear slid down her cheek.

"You're so noble. I wish I were like you. Does anything scare you, Genma?"

"Tsunade, I'm out of my wits with fear right now." I pointed out. "But I'm going to save Anko. I failed my mission, anyway." Tsunade frowned.

"You didn't fail. You've passed in my book. Genma, you're the most suicidal, acumen-less person I have ever met, but I wish you luck." I smiled at her. But I was worried. What does she know that I don't? Whatever the hell it is, I suppose it was something strong enough to make her cry.

"Thanks. I'm going to gather a search--"

"I have one. Alright, come on out."

I turned around. From random places, I saw many people I know come out. They assembled in the center of the room. I blinked.

The rookie nine, Gai's team, Kurenai, Asuma, Kakashi, Gai, Raidou, Izumo, and Kotetsu stood smiling at me. Hayate suddenly entered, holding coffee casually, which he handed to Tsunade. He jumped into the horde of people anyway, and Yuugao followed.

"Okay, people! Listen!"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"You will do everything Genma says, and if he is not available, Kakashi, Kurenai or Asuma will be there for consent. This is an S-rank mission; don't bring Anko back without killing Orochimaru. Bring her back dead or alive." I winced noticeably. A picture of mangled Anko made itself vivid my mind. "If you die on this mission," Tsunade gave us all a despairing look, "I will make your graves an official landmark."

"Orochimaru's location, what is it?" asked that kid…Neji. Yes, him.

"Valley of the End." replied Tsunade. Neji raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

"Can we bring Sasuke back if we see him there?" asked Naruto. Ah, yes, he's a good kid.

"Sure…" replied Tsunade slowly. "But the main thing is to bring Anko back. Understood?"

"Yes." they replied.

I smiled to myself. These people were willing to sacrifice themselves for Anko, and indirectly, me. I was pretty speechless. They made me look like a stingy bastard! …I am stingy, though. I'll admit that.

"Okay, hold up. You people are willing to die for me?"

The teens snickered and looked at me with their big eyes.

"Who would we annoy by touching your hair?" the girls said.

"And what proctor yells at you for no reason and doesn't have any patience whatsoever for kids?" Naruto pointed out. I shook my head.

"Oh, yeah, how could we live without the most intolerable morning person in Konoha? And how would I live without my best friend?" Raidou said, in his typical good sprits. This…FREAK shouldn't be so happy if there's a high chance he'll die, but oh well, to each his own, then.

"Are we going?" asked Asuma, grinning maliciously.

"Not yet…Okay, people, here's how it's going to work. Go pack light, only the stuff you need with some food and stuff. Meet me at the gates in hour, I won't wait for anyone. Uh…yeah…" No one moved. But I caught Asuma and Kurenai sneaking sly looks to each other.

"We will," began Kurenai, "but you have to admit one thing to us first."

"And that would be…?" I questioned, impatient.

"Are you in love with Anko?" she asked. The question repeated itself in my head, and my face got hot. Kind of feverish, I had to look somewhere else to avoid blushing.

"No." I replied firmly. Kurenai and Asuma groaned.

"If you say so," he replied. I sighed quietly with complete relief.

"Now go!"

A huge puff of smoke indicated they were all with me. Good, but I'm not used to being the leader, but in something epic as this I guess I'll have to.

I had no idea kids were so enthusiastic about suicidal missions. The Konoha Twelve were all there, talking excitedly like they were going on a field trip instead of some suicidal mission for some crazy guy chewing on a toothpick 24/7. Heck, they were here before I was. And I'm the fucking leader! They had packed lightly, which is good. They seem to be packrats…from their appearance, I know they do some regular packrat-ting. His or her dirty little hair…and those greasy faces…the pubescent scents…

"Hey, you're looking at us like we're lepers! WAHAHA! We're clean as can be!" The kid that pointed out my loathe for "growing" teens was that kid that is always talking and gets pissed easily. I know his name, I proctored his sister…oh, yeah, Kiba. To contradict his statement, I'd say he hasn't taken a bath in a while. Noticeably.

"Hm?" I suddenly remembered he had spoken to me, "No, no, it's not that," though it really was the fact I was going to be traveling with these imps. "I was thinking about other matters…things I won't share with you guys." I said darkly. Okay, that last part I didn't add consciously. Kiba's eyes widened to the size of tortillas, which I suddenly crave.

"OOH! We're total pimps! We can totally handle whatever you're thinking about!"

"Yay! Let's guess what the crazy toothpick guy is thinking!" Naruto said. I frowned and shoved off their remarks.

"Oh, please." Before I knew it, I was sitting on the ground with two big, blue eyes staring deeply into mine. Kiba was holding a clipboard, making me wonder where the hell he got it from.

"Pensive," Naruto said studying me. Those weird eyes of his are somewhat relaxing. "Troubled, annoy--"

"What are you doing?" Neji walked over him and Kiba. Crap. That kid had really shot up since the last time I saw him. I didn't realize it in the office, but he looked older…not only the fact he was about five foot six now.

"OH! We're reading Genma's mind," Kiba said, nodding proudly.

"Yeah!" Naruto added, for no reason. Neji sighed.

"You're not going to get anything like that," he said, suddenly smirking, "You'll get info like this!"

"Kiba and Naruto! What are you doing?" Kurenai had showed up at the perfect time. Wow, this day has had many interruptions. Neji quickly walked away and Kiba and Naruto looked at her suggestively, and Kiba whispered something that made Naruto smile erotically. Kurenai either didn't notice, or was used to it. With a body like hers…damn, how can you _not _look?

"Hi! What's up?" Kiba said.

"Yeah!" Naruto said again.

"Oh, in answer to your question, we're trying to read Genma's mind." Kiba said, with a dramatic and mysterious flourish. Kurenai's eyebrow went up.

"OOOOOHH! Look behind the pupils!" Naruto said ominously.

"Sure, whatever, okay? Just quit pissing him off and go play with your little friends."

"OKAY!" the two took off to go mess with someone else. I was freed of the imps attacking-- FINALLY.

Everyone was there by twelve forty five, the exact time I had said. So, in that case, we took off. The Valley of the End is approximately six hours away at a pace of ten miles per hour. Tree hopping, as I call it, would be the easiest, fastest way. We were flying through the trees, and the only sound was the WHOOSH when you go hopping off a branch…and the teens talking nonstop. I was actually the only quiet one. Behind me I heard, "She's like, a total bitch" from Ino, and then some yawns from that Shikamaru guy, and I nearly went to go shut up Kurenai and Asuma, who were having a heated debate over what the purpose of nails were. It was, believe me, really, REALLY annoying to be hearing things like "We need our fingernails to scrape things and stuff" and then "Well, you get a kunai and figure it out". I almost went back there and did some major slapping. Hayate and Yuugao were gossiping about ANBU. Surprisingly, the ANBU…they're known for wild parties and night clubs. And sex scandals, believe it or not. But it's true. And also, there are a lot of spastic people there. That's even more surprising; those people are freaking emotionless. But around two weeks ago I saw a bunch of them walking around town, CRYING saying "Oh, it was such a beautiful movie! I want to see it again!" and the rest of the group agreed with waving their tissues around. I think that's enough proof they're smoking crack.

How I know this is because when I was thirteen or so, Kakashi and I were curious about what goes on behind the steel doors, so, we used the transformation jutsu and walked in. We were greeted by some lady asking us, "Where's that prick?" and we were like, "What prick?" and then she said "Hello? My boyfriend, who slept with someone else!"…And so, from that day on, we decided that would never be spoken of again.

The sun was beating down on us, but no one except for me seemed to care, really. They were too busy talking. I, on the other hand, was threatening to crack. It was a decent day of decent weather, with a decent breeze here and there. I looked behind me briefly to see that everyone was not only talking but making faces and gestures to go along with what they were saying. Which was something violent, apparently. I didn't need someone to tell me they were talking about gory video games and "pimp" explosions.

"Hey, like, so, like, we're, like, rescuing Anko, right?" I looked at Ino straight in the eye, who had caught up to me, and I was not comprehending anything she had said.

"Excuse me?"

"The whole, like, point of this, like, mission is to like, save Anko, like, right?"

"Uhh…yes?" I took a guess there. I have no idea what she just said. She said it too fast and with unnecessary words tied in, making it impossible to follow what she was saying.

" 'Kay." she returned to her friends. Note to self: teach these kids correct word usage and grammar. I might as well give up now though, they are beyond help.

I have never been so grateful to sit down in my life. My legs, well, burn like the very depths of hell. I was so freaking tired, and so was everyone else. I'm taking a plane back or something, 'cause this is totally insane. Those six hours were LONG. Now, we were in some nice little cave at the foot of the valley…okay, _nice_, maybe not. A bunch of stalactites are staring at us from the ceiling in danger of falling, and where would they fall? On us, of course! It's our luck to face these stupid things.

The kids were outside, and the adults inside. There was already a fire in the cave, and we had Yuugao and Kurenai making things for us. But as they cooked, I heard more than once "fucking bastards". Hey, it's not my fault I'm too lazy to cook. Kakashi claims he doesn't know how to cook, Asuma's cooking put us in the hospital for two days, we don't trust happy Raidou to cook, Iruka neither, Izumo and Kotetsu were supervising the kids, and Yuugao didn't want "her little Hayate" to be doing anything strenuous. Since when is cooking something that makes you sweat and pant? Seriously, if I can cook without busting my ass, I think Hayate can too. As for Raidou, well, he's a decent cook, but we don't know what he puts in his food, so…we just made the girls do it.

As a result, they took turns cussing about us and giving us these nasty looks. They think we're total losers that don't even have girlfriends. Except for Yuugao. She was loathing everyone BUT Hayate. At one point, I noticed Kurenai giving me this absolute glower. When I looked at her, she shook her head slowly. The fire gave her a totally possessed look that was freaking me out. The red eyes stood out under the shadows cast on her cheeks. I scooted closer to Asuma, who was bragging about something no one cared about while smoking. As usual.

"Uh, are they freaking you out?" I asked. Asuma frowned and looked at the women. The frown was replaced quickly.

"Oh, shit, Kurenai's going to attack us."

"How do you know?"

"Retard, can't you see she's popping her knuckles and walking over to us?"

"Oh! I thought that was the exorcist!" I seriously thought that was the exorcist. She was scary enough right now, anyway…

"Well, it's not, so, uh, let's go supervise the kids…"

"Yeah."

We walked out of the tense cave and watched the teens messing around. They looked so carefree. Even though they were playing leap frog and Kiba almost died of whiplash, they were having fun. I only hoped they'd live to see to see his or her children to be doing the same.

Yeah. Hope you like it. Don't forget to review. Please review, it might ease my tonsillitis a bit! ;


	9. Chapter 9

-1Chapter 9: Oh Crap

Before I insult something, I must say that my mother is obsessed with going to bed at ridiculously early times. Anyway, I don't own Naruto, but someday, you'll watch me, someday, I'm going to own the world.

"Dinner's ready!" called Yuugao.

"FINALLY!" Izumo and Kotetsu ran in, pushing her aside. When everyone else that was CIVIL was in, we started to eat…or attempted to eat, I should say. What was sitting on the plate in front of me looked like…something you'd find decomposing somewhere in a morgue. My stomach churned.

"Well, eat up!" hissed Kurenai.

"Um, is this--"

"Eat the damn food right now." she returned. Asuma picked at it gently, and finally took a piece and dropped it into his mouth.

"HOLY CRAP!" he spit it out. "What is that?"

"Food!" Yuugao replied, busting out a can of soup. Kurenai did the same.

"Wait a minute…YOU RIPPED US OFF!" announced Kotetsu.

"Duh," the women replied. "We're not busting our butts cooking for you lazy slobs."

"Ah, well, it won't kill me. Izumo, dig my grave if I die." Kotetsu said solemnly.

"Okay."

Kotetsu winced, and stuffed some into his mouth. I expected a gag reflex, but what I saw was a satisfied chew and a swallow. Awkward silence…

"YUMMY!" Kotetsu was barreling most of his plate into his mouth.

"I don't like it, but I'll eat it!" chirped Raidou happily.

I looked at what sat before me, and then at the suicidal people.

"I'm going hunting," I announced.

"I'm joining," mumbled Asuma.

"After preparing this shit for hours, you're not going anywhere. Now eat up…" Kurenai said. Asuma whimpered, and I grimaced. "I'll give you a kiss, Asuma!" she taunted.

"Hand me that plate!" he commanded, grinning triumphantly.

"…I'm not hungry…"

"I don't care if you're starving or full Genma, you're eating."

With that, I was pinned to the ground and force fed a decent amount of the substance to permanently stupefy me. The kids ate normally. How, pray tell, could they shovel heaps and heaps of this crap into those mouths of theirs?

Before I fell asleep that night, I wondered how long I would last before the stuff took a toll on me. The fire had been put out hours ago, and it was quiet. But I heard something else. Giggles? Or sobs? Whispers, maybe? I quietly shifted in my sleeping bag and searched for the source of the sound in the dark. The familiar voice, the pitch…Ah, I'm a complete retard. It was Anko. Her giggles filled my head. I sighed out of complete desperation.

Where was she? Was she…alive? I couldn't bear to think of it.

I suddenly felt something tap my side. This is serious. Am I feeling her fingers tickling me again? Senile dementia…I was right. Wow. I ignore the feeling, and tried to drift off to sleep. The tapping continued.

"Genma?" whispered a voice. Or, should I say, hallucination. I turned to face the Inuzuka and Ino was next to him, both crouched over me.

"What?"

"We don't feel good."

"Not my problem,"

"Our teachers won't wake up!" she whined.

"Well, what do you want me to do? Blast a shotgun aimlessly only to wake them up? If you don't feel good, then rest. Or something.

"That's why woke up!" replied Kiba. "We feel like shit on an Arizona day!" What is this crazy kid talking about?

"Again, what do you want me to do?"

"Can you help us?"

"With what?" These kids will face the side of me that comes when I don't get enough sleep.

"We don't feel good!" whined Kiba this time. I have no choice but to get up. I sat up to my normal height and studied them, or what I could see in the dark. Nurse Genma is in…

"Okay, well, specify."

" 'Kay. It's our stomachs!"

"Ask the unknown chemical we ate," I replied stonily. If you asked what we ate a question, it wouldn't surprise me if it answered…Are these kids dumb or something?

"Do we feel hot to you?" Are they serious? They want me to _touch_ them? Their foreheads? UGH! That's gross! I don't want to touch sick people, much less teens!

"What is the damn racket?" Kakashi, who was near us in his sleeping bag, shot up, pissed off. Who can blame him?

"These two don't feel good." Kakashi made a noise in his throat and reached forward to put a hand on Kiba's forehead. And, to accomplish that, he brushed greasy brown bangs from his forehead. How did he do that without wincing? Kakashi did it almost lovingly! I wouldn't, couldn't do it to even people our age.

"Oh, Kiba. You feel a bit warm." Kakashi went to Ino next. "You do too. Do you guys want to sleep near me?"

"Okay," the other two agreed. The teenagers dragged their sleeping bags over close to Kakashi's and laid there. Kakashi didn't seem to mind the fact two sick kids are near him. I'm no germaphobe, believe me, but _teens_…

"Genma."

"God, what? Go away!"

I don't know or care who I'm talking to, but because of the pitch I was guessing it was one of the adults.

"Don't talk to me that way!" I detected the familiar note of Hyuuga pride, and I was sure it was Neji. The Hyuugas tend to pronounce words briskly, but so nicely and clear. I love it when they talk. But not at this time, or in that tone.

"Son, shut up. Don't talk to _me_ that way." I heard him scoff.

"Do you think I care about what you think?"

"Fuck you…" I mumbled.

"Want to repeat that?" I heard Neji say.

"Is that a challenge, son?"

"Perhaps, now wake the hell up."

"Make me." he sighed.

"I don't have time for this! If you want to know something, WAKE UP."

I sat up and blinked. The light streaming into the cave was extraordinarily bright, nearly blinding me. Neji glared at me. "Finally."

"Brief me…"

"Alright. Well, went sent Iruka and Raidou--"

"WHY?" The Hyuuga sighed in complete exasperation.

"Let me finish!" regaining his composure, he continued. "We sent them to go scout the area for any possible hideouts. They returned with several possible locations. We tried to wake you up, but it was useless. Anyway, they went off to go search a bit more. I wanted to let you know. Answer your question?" I stared at him blankly.

"Yes. What time is it and where's everyone else?" Neji scoffed.

"Look around, and it's about seven thirty."

"_Seven thirty?_"

"Yes. Raidou and Iruka went off at around five."

"In the morning?"

"Obviously. Izumo, Asuma, Hayate, Kotetsu…" Neji looked over his shoulder, came closer to me and whispered, "they went to go find edible things…" I sighed and shook my head. But isn't it a bit fucking early for that?!

I slid out of my sleeping back and studied the illuminated cave. I saw that the cave was relatively empty except for the Hyuuga whore, Neji, Ino, and Kurenai…oh, Kiba too, but I couldn't really see him. He was getting a backrub from Kurenai. That made me decide that maybe I'd get one if I went over there…

"What's up with him?" I asked, sitting next to Kurenai.

"He's sick." No duh. He's on his stomach and groaning. Oh, yeah, why don't you answer people while looking at them, lady?

"Yes…he has a fever…" added the Hinata-- yeah, I found out her name's Hinata. If the kid is red in the face, I think even I can figure it out.

"Yeah."

My eyes followed Kurenai's hand making its way up and down Kiba's tan back.

The kid has a fever…and she's giving him a backrub?!

EWWWWWWWWW! She's making contact with a teen. A SICK teen.

"Do you suppose he contracted it from the "food" you fed us, Kurenai?" I said mockingly. Kurenai still didn't look at me.

"…no…" she sighed. "Do you?"

"DUH!"

"Go to hell," was her sweet reply. I suddenly realized she was holding a glass of vodka. Vodka…at seven in the morning…I rest my case.

I suddenly caught Hinata leering at me, so I decided to leave the cave…Hyuuga whore almost sprang into action there.

Once safe from the rapist, I stood out and made an attempt to relax. Not that it worked. I need to find Anko before I crack. I hadn't realized it so fully, but…I miss her.

I miss her a lot. It's not the same without her. I was beginning to realize what Tsunade meant. Will she really be the same? Will I…ever find her. I'm going to go find her. The swelter of her presence is gone, leaving my skin to fight the cold pricking with each blow of the wind. Well, if I'm ever going to find her, I might as well try now, right?

"Kurenai, where's everyone else?" I asked, striding back into the cave.

"The other teens are off somewhere playing. Why?"

"Tell them I'm off looking for Anko. If I'm not back in thirty six hours, leave for Konoha without a second thought."

Kurenai's head snapped up from Kiba and looked at me directly. She held me in her gaze.

"Good luck and be careful. And if you find Anko…?"

"I'll…try to get you guys to help. If, you know, Oro doesn't kill me first." Kurenai smiled.

"Well. See you soon?"

"Hopefully! Anyway, bye."

I walked out of the cave and looked up until my neck got a crick. This would take a while. It's craggy, perfect for hideouts…and rockslides. If I find Anko, it won't matter to me even if I could never leave my bed again. She'd be by my side, and that's all I think I need to live. Well, might as well get going.

The higher I scaled the irregular valley, the colder it became, naturally. I think it might snow…IN OCTOBER! That's insane. The cloud cover is thick though, and the dang flak jacket isn't keeping the cold out of me. I'm not a huge fan of the cold, but I detest the heat. It needs to be seventy degrees and I'm happy. It's at least, oh, thirty degrees or so. Windy, too, so that didn't make it any warmer.

Geez. This freaking mountain, whatever the hell it is, is steep. Heck, if I'm not climbing a forty five degree angle, I don't know what I'm climbing. I'm hanging…upside down…I'M DEFYING GRAVITY! Oh, shit! I'm not even latching on with chakra. This is unbelievable. I craned my head over my shoulder.

Yeah. The ground is right below me. I have a perfect birds eye view. I'd say I'm about…two hundred, maybe three hundred feet above ground. So…if I fell…OKAY! Better not think of that. Lucky for me, though. Heights don't scare me. There is one thing that worries me though. How am I defying gravity and how much weight can this…cliff or something can take before snapping off? Anyway…onto the climbing. Climbing is easy. Maybe not the most fun thing ever, I'm definitely feeling the strain, and pain, on my abs, but it'll all be worth the pain of losing my life as long as Anko is still living. I don't care if I die, but I want her alive. Of course, if we both lived would be nice, but let's not get optimistic. Something is bound to happen. I'll either die, or she'll die, and then I'll be straitjacketed and psychotic for life…or…I'd commit suicide…

Okay, happy thoughts now! Uh, let's see…uh, well, nothing came to mind, so, yeah. Back to the pessimistic thoughts. It's really, really cold. My fingers are freezing. However, I can still hold on, upside down too. Ooh! This weird-ass cliff and or rock dealio is almost at an end. Well. I'm at the edge…so, now I have to pull myself up and over, right? Eh. That sucks. Whatever, if I fall I'll figure something out.

I held onto the underside of the cliff with one hand, and held the rest of my body while my other hand searched around if there was stable rock I could hang onto. Okay…weird, there actually is rock. Good. Amazing. So, I kicked off the underside and pulled myself up so I was climbing a ninety degree angle. Pssh, this in cinchy. I looked up. Surprisingly, there's only a few more feet to get up to flat land, I think. I quickly went up the five or six feet and pulled myself over so I was on flat land. Tch, some valley this is. More like Hellish Mountain. But then it hit me.

I've been climbing up here for…well, judging by the position on the sun, it's around four o'clock. So, I have bee climbing here for something like eight hours. I knew I had good stamina, but this is crazy. Is it possible to scale some gay cliff for that long? Enough complaining.

I noticed I'm in a really craggy area, and in front of me there's this slab of rock that looks like a tidal wave frozen in time. Hanging upside must have had some effects on my mental stability, because I'm sure I'm hearing "Hey, Mr. Squirrel" from somewhere. Well, I'm going to find out what it is. Going around the tidal wave thingy, I began to think it was a simple hallucination, until I saw Izumo and Kotetsu messing with a some bystand-ing crow.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

The two looked up at me and smiled.

"We went to go look for Anko, but we found this bird instead. He's a pimp!"

"WAIT! Kotetsu, it might be a girl." pointed out Izumo.

"Oh my god, yes!" Kotetsu smiled wider. "So, whaddaya need?"

How can a bird be a pimp? Ugh, stupid kids. Actually, they're Anko's age, but they act young sometimes. Like complete retards.

"How the hell can a bird have his sluts if it's a dang bird?" It's not possible for some gay bird to be a pimp…is it?

"Hey, retards, birds can't be pimps, so get back to the cave before I have to haul your asses back there myself."

"Is that right?" snarled Izumo.

"Yeah." These bastards I can sling both over one shoulder. If Izumo were gangly as Kotetsu, then I'd be able to toss one of the teens onto the pile.

"You're really uptight, you know that? We all know it. You're in love with Anko." Kotetsu said.

"Oh, please. Don't be ridiculous. I'm doing this because Tsunade told me to."

"SURRRRRE…" they said in unison.

"Ah, shut up. Get back to the cave.

"WHY?"

" 'Cause I fucking said so."

"Fine. Bye Mr. Squirrel! Treat the ladies well!"

The two disappeared in some puff of smoke. Okay, then. Forget them. I kept walking around the tidal wave, which now I noticed looked like a hand grabbing something. As stopped when I saw something. Behind that slab, there was a hole. It was carved into the slab, kind of like a cubicle, or a doorway but the hole was there. One big enough for me to slip into comfortably. But something else was noticeable. I crept closer and peered into it. I leaned forward and studied what was hanging on from the walls of the hole.

Reaching down I noticed it was a kunai. Judging from the marks along the sides, there was restrain involved here. And something else. I'm not sure if hanging from one of them is what I think it is, but I reached further blindly until I felt it. I felt it and sucked n my breath. The silky cloth or a headbands was licking my finger . I took it and pulled up so I could see it. The country's insignia was on it, but dried blood stained the metal plate and the cloth. Well, what I'm going to do is retarded, but if I want to know who's it is, I'll have to sniff it. So, here goes.

The whiff gave away Anko's scent, strong and noticeable. She had been here. Okay, I told Kurenai to return to Konoha in thirty six hours if I wasn't back, and there's twenty eight hours left, so…I'm going in.

Saying a prayer and silently writing my will in my head, I came to the edge of the hole and was a little hesitant in jumping in. I don't know how deep it is, but if Anko's down there, then I'm going. Anko might be down there, but there might be other things along with her. Oh, well. Here goes suicide. I did a little hop in and I knew I'd never come back alive.

Dang, the chapters I'm writing get longer and longer! YAY! Okay, people, review, and have a nice day!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Superficial Fear

Guess what? You don't own Naruto, and I could care less if I did or didn't.

* * *

I didn't know what being scared was until this. I was in a fairly tight hole, it was dark, I was falling down some void, and I didn't know if my life would end here or now. Out of complete fear, I unpinned my arms and legs from my sides and jammed then against the sides of the hole. I stopped moving and held myself there.

I sighed. This wasn't working too well. Up above, I saw the light coming in from above, providing only enough to see up to my waist. Past that, it was darkness. I obviously couldn't have climbed back up to the surface, the opening was something like thirty feet above me! I couldn't hold myself up for long either. My arms and legs are starting to quake. I let go and returned to falling, but now in complete darkness. The hand I waved in front of my face was part of it. I was beginning to feel the hole was coming to end. I curled myself up tightly and waited for the ground. This is going to hurt.

I fell a bit further before hitting the bottom. All my nerves pinched, and I snapped.

"FUCK!"

My cuss jumped around emptiness, and I heard the word go ahead, off somewhere. That would mean I'm in a tunnel that goes ahead. Maybe it has more passages. Let's see.

"DAMN!"

Well, hey, it's a "natural" exclamation of pain for me, and it worked. But no, the tunnel goes only in one direction. How much do you want to bet if I take one more step the place is going to cave in or blow up or something? Before I do take a step, though, I'm going to recover for a sec…I'm freaking aching all over. Once I did, I took a step ahead of me and I heard a sort of static-y buzz and braced myself. Nothing came, but the whole tunnel was illuminated by tiny blue lights going for what seemed like miles ahead of me. Yay, miles of aimless running. Oh well. At least I've got mad speed skills, but still, this place looks like those gay subway tunnels…But this, this tunnel, leads to Oro's place. I'm sure of it.

I ran for something like twenty minutes; four miles or so. I was slightly out of breath, but not tired. In my pocket I felt Anko's headband, and I was suddenly relieved of my anxiety. It came back, though, so it was pretty aimless…until I reached a darker room, but the ceiling of the cave was high up, and long, thick stalactites hung from there. They looked like fingers reaching down to poke something. That's a retarded way of comparing it but, seriously, that's what they look like. Okay…let's get the echo again.

"ORO IS AN ASSHOLE!"

"No he's not."

I got an deep echo, but I didn't need the blank voice to join. I jumped and looked around like some crazed animal. Holy crap, who talked to me?! I looked to my side and I saw…a girl.

Stony eyes, ragged clothing, and hair that fell flat down mid back. There was no color to her cheeks, and I swear, it was an apparition. The mouth was thin, like it was pressed together or something. There was a pair of straight, impassive eyebrows above those emotionless eyes. The bangs that fell above her face were off to the side, and yet I realized something. The color. The mauve-ish, purple strands falling over the shoulder. It was…Anko.

Tsunade was right. Anko had changed. I didn't recognize her.

"A-Anko?!"

She frowned at me.

"Who are you?" she asked faintly.

I strangled a laugh. Is she serious? She knows who I am…

"Don't be dumb, you know who I am."

"No, I don't. Tell me who you are." She's messing with me. Anko couldn't have forgotten me.

"_Genma_." I smiled at her, and quickly added, "your…partner for work." That was painful…!

"Never heard of him or her." Anko replied, cocking her head.

"What? Who do you know then?" The corner of her mouth went up suggesting a smile.

"I only know or care about Orochimaru." she replied loftily. She has to be kidding me. What happened to her? Well, Oro messed her up or something, but did he have to take her memories away? That's…that's just fucked up.

"Anko…seriously…"

"What?"

Well, she responds to her name…that's helpful…I guess…

"Where's that bastard so I kill him?"

"Orochimaru is not a bastard. He is the ruler of the shadows."

'Ruler of the shadows'? Okay…whatever.

"Well, where is he?"

"I don't think I'll be telling you." she answered. Oh, and why not? It's hard to deal with this. I can't believe she's gone like this. Anko is detached, she has no emotions. I, on the contrary, am battling them right now before they get out…

"Anko, where is he?"

"I'm not telling. He told me not to tell." Anko smiled.

"Ugh…Anko…come on…"

"Why do you want to know?"

" 'Cause, that's why." I'm a retard. That won't help here, but oh well. Anko turned on her heel and walked off. Should I follow? Aw, why not. So I went behind her, and I realized she was absolutely gaunt. Before, she had the normal feminine fat, but not fat, as in overweight. But this was like, grossly skinny. In a matter of a day, how could this have changed so much? I really didn't recognize her. She wasn't Anko anymore, physically and mentally. I found it hard to resist crying for some reason. And I'm pretty damn hard to get any tears out of.

"Why are you following me?" she asked, irritated.

"Uh…"

"I already told you, I'm not giving away Lord Orochimaru's location."

"Yes you are!"

"No."

"YES!"

"NO."

"YES, dammit!"

Anko looked at me and shook her head. I was totally exasperated. Then I remembered something. She loved to mess with my hair, so maybe…I took her weightless, translucent hand and ran it through my hair. I shuddered at the cold of her hands, but ran it through. I watched Anko's face mold into a deep frown. She immediately took her hand back.

"Now do you remember me?" I asked.

"I…vaguely. I don't know who you are or what you're here for."

That being said, holding back tears became harder yet. Was she really gone?

"You don't remember me. Or, vaguely, anyway. After the arguments we had, the good times, messing with Tsunade and everyone else, you don't know who I am?"

"No, I don't."

"Do you remember this?" I pulled out er headband and put it in her hands. Anko studied it for quite a while.

"Well, what is it?" she asked, tossing it back to me.

Penultimate heartstring, cut and frayed, last nerve, stricken with a perfect bull's eye.

"It's the headband from Konoha."

What will I have to do to her to remember? What have I done to deserve this, and what in the past could I have changed to prevent this from happening? Oh, falling in love of course. If I hadn't fallen in love with her, this never would've happened, or at least I wouldn't be here in some cave after her. I added after some thought, "Your home country. Where you were born and raised, Anko."

"I don't recall, sorry. Now, Orochimaru has things he wanted me to do."

"But I--" I stopped suddenly.

A scream, coming, traveling, I should say, from behind me, from the tunnel chilled my blood. Anko cocked her head. She was distracted, and I had no choice but to do this…I put her in a head lock and swiftly put a kunai to her throat. I held it there for a minute recalling the scream. If I was not mistaken, that high pitched scream belonged to Yuugao.

"Augh!"

"Tell me where he is or it's your head."

"No!" she choked out. I lifted her off the floor and pressed the kunai so it drew some blood.

"Yes!" I was absolutely teary, realizing I was threatening to kill her, but I continued anyway. If I wanted her back, this is what I would have to do. I wouldn't kill her, but the threats will have to go far…to my utmost dismay.

"Fine."

I put her down and sighed. Okay, good. She got that far. "I'll show you." she said.

"Quickly, please."

"Right…" Anko flashed a smile at me. I returned her smile, but quickly stopped it, the tears were too far on the edge and quivering on my lashes. Anko quickly walked off, and I followed her down somewhere. I was too distracted to pay attention to where I was going. It got darker and gloomier.

"We're here." I looked around. We were in a place similar to our previous surrounding, but I saw Oro in the distance, grinning. Anko quickly skipped off to him.

"My lord, we have a visitor!" she said happily. I'm not a visitor, I mean death. For him anyway. I have no intention of killing Anko, but I will injure her if I have to. Orochimaru smiled sardonically at me.

"Is that right?"

"Yes, Oro!"

"What did you call me?"

"Hm?" Anko looked at him curiously, and it reminded me of Kiba with that look only Inuzukas can pull off. Orochimaru sneered.

"You know what you did?"

"I…did?"

Orochimaru stood up and walked over to her. He made this pissed off face and slapped Anko so hard it made me scream. She ended up on the floor with a hand to her face and gasping.

"Bastard!" Out of complete anger, I tackled Oro and knocked him over, but not before he got to kick Anko. That made me angrier…and that's where I went savage. Between gouging his face out with my trusty toothpick and biting his arm, I was kicking him nonstop with one leg and had him grappled with the other. Anko sat watching us, eyes wide, and big red welt where Oro's hand had touched her.

Suddenly, I heard glass break in behind me and I turned around when I heard a savage growl and a sharp cry. Anko was laying curled up in a ball and I was hit with the familiar smell…and standing above her I saw Kurenai…holding a smashed vodka bottle, and two more were tucked neatly under her arm. Oro and froze and stared. I did too. Even in the dim light, I saw her pink cheeks and her swaying movement…Kurenai was DRUNK. "da fuck are you lookin' at?" she asked me.

"Uh…"

"Oh, shit!" I looked up and I saw Asuma and Raidou run in. Asuma smiled painfully at me. "She's drunk, I think she mistook someone else for Oro, sorry."

"Whatever." Anko would probably suffer severe, permanent damage to the mind with the blow Kurenai gave her.

"Hi, Genma!" Raidou said.

"Hey. Gimme a sec, okay, Raidou?"

I stabbed Oro in the eye with my dearest toothpick and he let go of me and I let go of him. I ran toward Anko but ducked when I saw two things glimmer in faint light. A "teehee" came from above me. Okay…Yuugao's here. And Hayate two. Those two always carry around those gay katanas and they're obsessed with them. But, they're so graceful when slicing things and people into pieces. Seriously, it's like, pretty.

"THE ANTICHRIST IS COMING!"

And so are the rookie nine…as Kiba has informed us…

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" the girls huddled together and glared at Kiba, who was laughing like he was the antichrist. As a result, Asuma hit him upside the head. Funny.

I took a minute to observe the place. Kurenai was drunk and smashing Oro with her other large bottle of vodka. Oro was giving her such a look…I saw Ino taking pictures of it with her cell phone, but the guy was like crapping himself in fear of Kurenai. HAHAHAHAHAHHA! Take that, bastard! HAHAHAHAHA! Anyway…I let Kurenai scream things that won't be mentioned take care of him for a while. I ran up to Asuma to get a quick briefing.

"What's the deal?"

" 'Kay, well, Gai, Izumo, Kotetsu, Iruka, Lee, and Chouji are up making a hole so this place will collapse and all that blah blah blah, yeah." Gees, Asuma can't brief himself right. I have no idea what he's talking about.

"And…Kurenai…?"

Asuma laughed thunderously and slapped his leg.

"Ahahahaha…she had four of those. I'm talkin' the one and half or two pint bottles of the vodka stuff. It was scary. It _is _scary."

"I noticed."

"So, what's the deal with that lady scrunched up over there?" I cringed.

"Anko…"

"NO!" Asuma recoiled, glancing at Anko, horrified. Well, pal, that's how I feel, but toss in some love and pain to the mix.

"Yeah…" Asuma gave me a sympathetic look and patted my back. Why do people always touch me? Well, him Raidou, Iruka and Kotetsu are all touchy. They'll poke and prod at you for no reason. I hate that!

I looked over at the crazy battlefield. Kiba was dragging Anko to safety while saying "Bring it on down to big daddy…oh, shit, it's all good, it's all good…HAHAH I PWN YOU…" so he's apparently feeling better, and Hayate and Yuugao were giving each other quick kisses, the girls were shrieking when they saw Oro was all bloody, Raidou was being happy, and Kurenai was…well, we all know she's under the total influence of alcohol. And then I suddenly realized that with these people it's pretty hopeless. I might as well kiss Anko and my mental sanity goodbye.

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That was fun! REVIEW! I suck at action scenes, so you know...yeah. Anyway, review to just help me stay sane. My new braces are killing me. 


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Assassination

IDON. Figure it out, son.

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I have never been so wrong in my life. While I stood, petrified with surprise, the rest of people were kicking ass. Oro was drenched in vodka, courtesy of Kurenai, and had _short _hair now, thanks to Yuugao's obsession with cutting people's hair off for no reason. His tongue, once so long and…sleek…was being hacked through by Tenten. Put simply, I was shocked. 

"HEY! Come get your girlfriend over here and try to wake her up!" Kiba called, his dog nibbling on Oro's ankle happily. Oro was trying to kick him off, and apparently he hadn't learned he was outnumbered something like fifteen to one. I dodged more vodka and knives and dragged Anko somewhere where blood and alcohol wouldn't be flying around.

I kneeled down next to her and studied her. She seemed to be alive…seemed. I couldn't resist listening to her heartbeat for proof though. The steady bum-bum-bum of her heart was such a nice contrast to my spastic BANG BANG BANG. But with the hit Kurenai gave her, Anko would be pretty brain dead for a while-- if not forever…Well, now's not the time to think that, now's the time to watch some ass kicking. Since Oro hadn't realized imps were all over him and a drunk lady was near killing him, he just stood there shocked--but permanently shocked.

Now, I don't know if we should kill him yet, but Tsunade said to, so I'll watch Neji freeze his life. The kid, though fourteen or fifteen, has mad skills. 'Nuff said. After doing the fancy thingy where he goes all fast with his arms, Oro was laying on the ground, and I noticed Kiba's dog, whose name I think is Akamaru had bitten through most of his leg…eww.

"PEOPLE! I think he's dead!" I yelled, walking over to inspect the damage. Raidou leaned over Oro and stretched out his arm to poke him.

"Don't touch him!" shrieked Ino. Raidou shrugged and tapped Oro's forehead. Orochimaru did not move. He was stricken by Neji's skillz, or dead.

"How 'bout we figger' 'dis shit out old school?" Kurenai had her last bottle, and was about to slam Oro with it, but Asuma plucked it from her hands and tossed it somewhere else. "Da' hell whazzat for?" she asked. Asuma smiled and waited patiently until she fainted into his arms, and that didn't take too long.

"Too much alcohol?" questioned Shikamaru.

"YES," replied Asuma, smiling proudly. Shika snickered. No one did anything, but they all looked at me.

"What?"

"You're the leader so--"

"OH YEAH!" it's kind of pitiful I forgot my position. "Uhh…someone check for heartbeat or something…and then go wait for the others above to finish their hole. Yeah."

"Do I have to? I don't want to check Oro's pulse…"

"FINE!" these people are freaking sissies. "I'll do it." I took Oro hand and waited until I felt a small pound. Nothing came. "Kiba."

"Yeah?"

"Make sure he's dead."

" 'Kay!" Kiba went off doing an autopsy, and I sent everyone else to either help him or record the happenings of this gay mission, and I went and sat next to Anko. While they were busy, the ceiling caved in perfectly. Up above, past the shaft of light, I heard "Hey, Mr. Squirrel!". I couldn't resist smiling for some reason. Kotetsu jumped down some forty feet to join me, but stopped a few feet before me…smiling in a totally sardonic, psychotic, knowing way.

"I'm not a leper, geez."

"I know!" he answered with a giggle.

"So, what's your fucking problem?" Is he going to hide something from me forever or will he tell me and prevent pissing me off? Seriously, what is it with people? Kotetsu pointed to my lap. I looked down, thinking there was some sort of bug crawling on me, or that I was bleeding heavily. I suddenly understood.

I didn't take note of the fact Anko's head was in my lap, and that I was stroking her hair. My mouth went dry and my cheeks bloomed a blush quickly. Rudolph spread holiday cheer in my veins. Kotetsu smirked, but said nothing.

"You, Kotetsu, say nothing, okay?"

"Alright…" Kotetsu raised an eyebrow slyly. Uh-oh, I'm screwed. "Hey, everyone, come here for a sec!" I was surprised at how fast everyone dropped their work and walked over, "Oooh"-ing. "Ready, people?"

"Anko and Genma, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes sex and a baby carriage!"

Since when did the song go like that? I remember it is as "first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes whoever with a baby carriage". I don't know, but man, that was degrading. I don't think my face should be shown ever again, but for now, I have to think of an excuse.

"Who changed that part?" I asked that sharply, as a demand, but what I got was guilty laughter from everyone. "Hey, retards, guess what? I'm giving her a head massage 'cause of Kurenai!" Big time lie, and they apparently sensed it.

"SUUUUUUUURRRE…!"

"Well, I was…" Think, Genma, think! Use the brain God gave you! "Picking bugs out of her hair! Seriously, no one wants things crawling around in their hair, right?" Shino sniffed loudly and folded his arms. Haha, what a loser. Everyone else bought it, though. Saved myself from a lot there. PHEW.

"Good point, good point."

"Bugs are gross!"

"Yah, that's smart, Genma."

Everyone went back to their jobs, but Raidou stayed, watching me. I think I'm going to kill someone right now.

"_What_, damn you, _what_ do you want from me?"

"I was wondering if I could borrow your kunai. Remember, I asked you this morning?" I stared at him blankly. What is he talking about?

"When did you ask me?"

"At, like, seven."

"Raidou…"

"Yes?"

"I was fucking asleep." Can he not tell the difference between a sleeping person and an awake person, or is he just so happy it doesn't matter? Raidou cocked his head.

"I thought you were awake."

"Why?"

"You were cussing." In my sleep? Oh, please.

"…I was?" I don't talk, much less cuss in my sleep.

"Yeah." Raidou replied. "It was funny. You were like, "that lil' bitch…oh damn right… 'f' that…what the 's'. That's why I thought you were awake." I can't believe this guy is my best friend. Ever since the third fucking grade. I can't believe I didn't notice being his friend was social suicide. Another thing I find strange, is that, why, why did he not say the actual cuss word? Really, who's he going to offend? I swear a lot, it's not like saying "fuck" or "shit" will make me uncomfortable, much less offend me. I don't think I'll ever understand him.

"…okay…" I took one of the tiny knives out of my pocket and tossed it to him.

"Thanks."

"What are you going to use it for?"

"Kiba asked for it. I think he's ripping Oro's guts out…"

"Well, tell him not to. Gimme that kunai." I caught the kunai he tossed back. "KIBA!"

Kiba jerked his head up.

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing to Oro?"

"Um…nothing…" Kiba quickly returned his attention on Oro. Since when was he the surgeon general?

"Kiba,"

"Fine. I'll stop eviscerating him." A shudder crawled up my back. Kids are pretty advanced these days…

I gently put Anko on the ground and went off to see exactly what he was doing. Kiba tried to cover it up, but I really think the blood that was everywhere kind of gave it away. "It's nothing!" he said. "Besides, you're too squeamish."

"Sure, whatever, now move." I gently kicked him, and I saw that Kiba's progress was pretty far. I see that he had severed ties with the stomach and bladder, and had managed to cut the intestines apart. I scowled at him. "Where did you learn how to do this?" he smiled at me.

"I saw my sister doing it to a dog for autopsy!" An Inuzuka? I bet he forgot to add the part about the wails and tears from them and all that when eviscerating a dog, even for scientific purposes. Inuzukas are way too emotional. And what an Inuzuka was doing eviscerating Oro, don't ask me. I had no idea they loved gore.

"Well, stop." I hoarded everyone in a circle and gave further instruction. "People, go back to the camp and pack up all the crap. I'm going to get Anko into the hospital."

"What do I do about Kurenai?" asked Asuma. "She's drunk…and she passed out 'cause of it."

"Um, I think you should come with me. Due to her present conditions, I think medication will be necessary…" Asuma smiled gingerly and nodded.

"From now on, you are under…" I looked around. Gai was too preppy and had no common sense I knew of, Kotetsu and Izumo are busy with their "Pimp", and Raidou is just _too _happy to be holding such a job. "You will be under the command of Kakashi and Hayate. What any of them says, goes. Second in command…Neji." Neji raised an eyebrow. Will he stop being his sarcastic, angst-y, Hyuuga self for a sec? "Yeah, you, because you're sane. Alright, go pack up, and get to Konoha ASAP. Asuma and I will be on our cell phones. Understand?"

" 'Kay." was their monotonous reply.

"Alright."

I took Anko bridal style and jumped out of the hole with Asuma behind me. Anko was very light, and easy to carry, at least in her current state. I couldn't help but wonder what they'd do to her at the hospital. Oro was dead, he couldn't control her, but did he still remain in her mind? Will she even have a mind after Kurenai's whack today? She better for crazy bitch Kurenai's life! But still, Anko forgetting me is serious…I was hoping, praying, she would at least recall me.

Hooray, another six hours of tree hopping…but this time I'll have the moon watching me. It's maybe six or seven, so that means we should make it in six hours at our previous speed, and If we go four times as fast…the trip should be done in a hour. "Hey, Genma, I have an idea!" Asuma said brightly.

"Yeah?"

"Why don't we just teleport to Konoha? It is really a lot easier!"

"If I had energy to get two people there…" I replied. I was tired--physically, but especially mentally. "I guess I can try." Asuma was replaced by some smoke that quickly passed. I'm so tired! Ah, well, the worst that can happen-- actually, I don't know what can happen…heheheheh…

I summoned what I had left in me, and before a heart can beat or an eye can blink, we were in front of the Konoha hospital. Before I mentally passed out, I quickly took Anko in and she was admitted. I was kind of out of it then. The world and minutes went by, but my mind was frozen in thought. I don't know if it was because I was so tired, but I couldn't think straight. Everything was fuzzy, my perception of the world was fading in my eyes. I got home, and obviously skipped dinner. I don't feel like eating at all. There's no point in changing, so I simply threw myself onto the sheets and fell asleep in seconds.

BEEP BEEP BEEP

"Fuck you…" My alarm clock. The source of hell on earth. I mean, with those red numbers, so possessed and _red_…and the shape…disgusting. For some reason, the alarm wouldn't turn off. Pissed off, I took it in my hand and threw somewhere randomly. My surprise came when I heard glass shatter. It couldn't have…broken my window? I can't throw with that steroid strength. I opened my eyes and saw, sure enough, that my window was indeed broken. Not broken, but nonexistent now. Where there was once glass had been replaced by air. I haven't been awake for a minute, and hell had already broken lose…all because of my damned alarm clock. It wasn't worth shit anyway, but now I have no window. I'll worry about the window later. Let's see what Tsunade wants. I called her and waited for her to answer.

"Ah, Genma, good morning!"

"Hey…"

"Tired?"

"I'm freaking brain dead." Tsunade laughed. Good sign.

"Well, come on up to the office whenever you can. Be here before nine thirty."

"What kind of shi-- What are my errands for today?" Now for the twist. I get a lot of crap to do.

"Mm, that'll be discussed here. I had something else I wanted to talk to you about." Hoorah. Fun for me.

"Okay."

"Bye!"

She hung up. Let's see, it's eight, so that means I can shower, and then waste time by eating or something. I'm not very hungry, though. It's like my appetite faded along with my acumen.

I'm clean, I have my coffee, I'll survive. Walking out of my apartment, I was hit with warmth and sunshine, with an exotic breeze. Seriously, though, this weather is insane-- one day it's raining and cold, the next day it's freaking summery. Oh, yes, it's fall, so imagine what spring is like. Bipolar weather. On my walk there, I was still partially brain dead and trancelike.

Upon walking into the building, hands were waved in front of my face.

"WAKE UP!"

"Eh? Oh, sorry."

That's what I got. I was too slumped in a stupor to care, really. I walked into Tsunade's room and flopped into a chair. She looked up from some papers and smiled.

"Hey."

"Hi."

"How are you?"

"Tired." What an interesting conversation we're having.

"I noticed! Well, Anko is the hospital--"

"Yeah, I know." I sighed heavily. "What are my errands today?" Tsunade raised an eyebrow.

"You get the day off," she replied.

"Huh?" Amazing! "I do?"

"Yes…now, off you go, off you go…" Tsunade waved me off, and I just left. If I had nothing to do today, why did she call me up here? God only knows, God only knows. Then, my fuzzy mind got an idea! I'm going to go visit Anko! Why didn't I think of this before? I'll go buy flowers, and all that stuff…heheh. I'm a bit anticipant, though. Anticipant about my nonexistent image in Anko's memory banks.

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Damn writing is fun. **REVIEW, and have a nice day!**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Relief

If you haven't figured it out yet, IDON.

I ran into the flower shop. There, I chose a nice medley of flowers, weeds they were not, and ran up to the register, but I was stopped by the cashier.

"Genma, hi! Who are those flowers for?" Ino asked me, chin in hand.

"You don't know her…"

"That would six dollars please!"

" 'Kay." I groped around blindly in my pocket until I found the right amount, and handed it to her."

"Tell Anko I said hi!"

"Ahh-- w-what are you talking about?"

Ino made an expectant face. "Well, send her my regards."

"I…uh…I said, these are for someone else."

"Uh huh, okay, right, sure, whatever you say, Genma."

"Childish ignorance…" I scoffed and left the place. What nerve. Thinking that she knows I'm in love, oh please. No one will ever know.

One problem I completely forgot: I'm allergic to pollen. And, well, these flowers have so much I can see it in clumps. So, I was walking into the hospital sneezing like some deranged idiot. They asked me if I needed treatment…Between my little sneezes, I told the receptionist to get me Anko's room. She hesitated, looking at me, the sneeze-y loser with flowers. "Uh, sir, we don't think you should spread your disease--"

"I'm allergic to pollen, rel--" I quickly stopped a sneeze. "-relax."

"Alright, then."

On the way through the winding hallways, there were little sneezes pricking my nose, but I could not sneeze. It was freaking aggravating. My eyes were tearing up, and at some points my breath sped up. But no sneeze came. That was a problem.

"Okay, she'll be groggy--"

"Whatever."

I walked into the room and shut the door. I quickly turned, suppressing more sneezes. For some reason, I kind of dreaded looking to see if she was on the bed. My heart began to beat a bit faster than usual. I finally looked up and saw Anko, who was reclining comfortably on the bed, windows wide open, a stick of dango in one hand. She looked at me, and was about to smile, but stopped.

"Genma! What's wrong?"

"Huh?"

"Why are you crying?"

"What are you talking about?"

Anko motioned me over. She reached out and ran a hand along my cheek. I became crippled thanks to the Reindeers, who I think were enjoying gymnastics off the walls of my heart. I looked at her face. It was…the color was back, and it looked the way it did before any of this. She smiled tenderly.

"You're teary…"

I didn't reply, a tickle stole my words. Here it comes-- the ultimate attack, the finishing blow, the unexpected repercussions of pollen. I slowly put a hand over my mouth. I'm ticklish, and this is the ultimate tickle. I almost started to laugh, but took in air sharply and---

"AHHH-- CHOO!" The flowers flew from my hands, and I fell back slightly. The sneeze was that insanely forceful-- my life is so messed up. Awkward silence. I groaned loudly.

"Damn pollen…"

"Gesundheit!" Anko laughed. I looked up and saw that petals were flying around above. So delicate, so sweet, so pretty-- like Anko. Bad news for my pollen allergy, but I'll live. I got up sheepishly and laughed nervously. Anko smirked at me.

"And I thought you were crying…hahaha! I see you're allergic to pollen, yet you still bought the flowers for me."

"DUH!" Wow, I sounded retarded there.

"Well…" Anko took a deep breath. "So am I!" She blinked quickly. "Achoo!" Okay, so, I'm not a loser, but now I'm making her sneeze. This is so crazy. I sat on her bed and started to play with her hair, entertained. Yes, it has spread to me: now I'm messing with her hair. It really is a lot longer than I thought, it swept the middle of her back. But the main thing is that…Anko remembered me.

"Anko, how did they…un-possess you?" Anko craned her head to look at me better. She smiled painfully, and lifted some hair off her back. I saw, that on one shoulder, there was a thick bandage. I talking at least an inch thick, taped down to her skin.

"Oro put that curse mark on me a long time ago. Oh, and my head hurts really bad in one area…" Anko patted on a spot in the back of her head. Yeah, I'll kill the crazy bitch later…

"I'm guessing they cut that whole piece of curse mark, and took…" I stopped to shudder. "the skin out, to remove any traces of the mark rooting to your nerves because it could travel up to your mind and make you psychotic."

Anko nodded.

"Yeah. I seriously have no skin there. It'll heal though." I smiled back, though I can't even begin to imagine what she's going through. Anko looked down.

"Genma?"

"Hm?"

"Who came to save me?"

"Oh, well, everyone but me…I'm sorry…"

"No, I mean, who had the idea to come after me." she specified.

"Well, that was me. But I didn't do anything else, really--"

"And the person who first set out?"

"…me."

"And the person who was holding me, unconscious?"

"…me…" I sighed. "What are you trying to get out of me?" I asked. She had managed to faze me, somehow. Anko looked into my eyes pensively. They sparkled like diamonds, and her cheeks were touched with shy strawberries.

"You were the one who saved my life. Don't be humble like that."

"Oh, please, Anko, I didn't do--"

Anko put a hand over my mouth.

"I don't want to hear that." She bit her lip. "The doctors said that if it wasn't for you, I'd be dead." Looking at Anko, the graceful expression she had made… think of her with that same look in a casket. I blinked back tears that suddenly floated on the brims of my eyes. Damn it. Why is it that whatever happens to Anko that is bad, I get more emotional than I normally would? I'm going to need to go to some psycho doctor. She continued. "Because of you, I'm still here." I nodded. Anko scooted closer to me and leaned against me, her head was touching my chest. I put my arm around her and pulled her tighter to me. "Thank you, Genma. I owe my life to you."

"Don't be ridiculous, Anko." She doesn't owe me anything at all. Except for paying my medical bills…two hundred dollars for nothing…

"Fine." she gave up. "Whatever you say."

"Well, what have we here?" Anko and I gasped, I let go of her and she recoiled from me. We both looked at the door sternly. Shizune stood there, wiggling her eyebrows. "I knew it!" she squealed.

"Don't be homosexual." Anko said.

"Yeah, we--we…you're so bent on trying to find out if there is love between us, you hallucinated…"

"Well, whatev--AHHH!" Tsunade strode in and pushed Shizune outside, then slammed the door. HAHAHA! Shizune got served. Tsunade looked pissed--we're screwed. She came really close to us and leaned in. Tsunade looked really, really, evil like that.

"I know your secret." she said, narrowing her eyes.

"Pssh, what secret? There's no secret anywhere, right, Anko?" She's onto us. Crap. This is going to be tough.

"A-DUH." she agreed. Tsunade smirked.

"Resume position. I won't tell."

"Ah, what, _what _are you talking about, Tsunade?" I began to sweat. It's not like this is the third degree, but…

"Yeah, he was just sitting here--" started Anko.

"Holding you." finished Tsunade. Anko's mouth dropped and I quickly looked somewhere else. Nope, I don't like her. She was just some girl: I failed to hide that, apparently. Tsunade looked victorious.

I sat there, looking out the window. And, I suddenly realized, I can't hide this forever. People are bound to find out someday. But I won't say anything, at least to Tsunade. Even so, I put my arm around Anko once again, and accepting defeat, Anko leaned on me. I don't think I'll ever be left alone for this.

"Aha!" Tsunade grinned. "I knew it!"

"Shut up…" I mumbled.

"You two look so cute-- oh, and make me shut up," she answered pompously. "I won't tell anyone, though. But then again, it won't matter, everyone knows."

"Knows what? You're senile and crazy?" Anko said angrily. Tsunade sniffed.

"No, Anko. That you to are like this--" Tsunade's middle and index fingers intertwined.

"Oh, please." Anko muttered.

"I'm thinking boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"NO!" Then Anko's eyes met mine, and we both looked off somewhere…blushing like little kids. "Well…" I started to say something, but decided it wise to shut up. Tsunade sobered a bit.

"You two seriously look good together." she said, raising her eyebrows. I scoffed and Anko sniggered. "I'm not kidding. Maybe I can set up a date for you two…"

"Uh, don't think so!" I quickly intervened. Tsunade rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. Anyway, Anko, how are you feeling?"

"Good." Anko replied simply.

"Very well, then. I'll be off to let you two discuss matters alone." Tsunade gave us a long look. "Notify me as soon as the wedding plans are made."

"Tsunade!"

"What?" with that and a sly smile, she left. Thank you, Lord. It's about time that crazy woman left. Anko and I were silent for a while.

"Hey, Genma…" she began.

"Yes?"

"Never mind!" she said with a wave of her hand.

"So…" That took a hope off of me.

"So, yeah…"

"How about the weather, eh? It's, uh, very weather-y."

"Yeah."

We sighed. A sudden impulse hit my mind. I think I'll ask Anko out. If anyone has a problem with it, too bad.

"Hey, Anko, when do you get out of the hospital?"

"Tomorrow. Why?" she replied.

"Well, I wanted to take you to dinner. Want to come with?" Now, I must say, that's smooth for a guy who gets crippled when hanging out with this girl. Not too straight up, and well, suave. For me, anyway. I can picture Asuma and Hayate asking out better. Particularly Asuma. He has a way with women, something I was not blessed with.

Anko looked at me for while, and then cracked a smile.

"Yeah. Sounds fun." she answered.

"Alright, I'll get you at seven, sound good?"

"Perfect. Oh, and Genma, I was thinking of what you did, and I wanted to give you a thank you…but in a different form, you see." Anko said. I watched expectantly for her to pull out something, a piece of paper as a thank you card or my "gift", but she did nothing except for smile sheepishly. I looked into her eyes for a sign of any sort of emotion. Nothing came, but I was the one that was shocked.

Anko threw her arms around me and pulled me closer to her, and pressed her lips against mine. Let me say, I haven't been so surprised in my life. This was like, totally uncalled for. So uncalled for, that when she let go, I fell off the bed in whole shock.

"Thanks a bunch!" she said playfully, laughing at me, and sneezed suddenly. When Anko got no reply, she looked over the side of the bed to check if I was alright. "Genma? Are you okay?" she asked, a hint of worry in her voice.

"Yeah, yeah…just let me recover here for a sec." Rudolph was not only doing gymnastics in my heart, but he was throwing a wild house party now. I was totally out of it. My common sense was blinded by…love, I suppose you could call it.

"Do you need medication?" she asked me.

"No, I'm FIIIIIIIIIINE." Oh, yeah, peachy with my heart problems and lack of knowledge about dealing with girls. I'm so sure Asuma wouldn't have even moved, much less fallen off the bed if Kurenai were to kiss him. I'm such a loser.

"Oh, wow, you were unprepared for that, weren't you?"

"It's all good! I'm fine, I was _prepared_…I totally expected that!" Yeah, right! I wish I expected that…

"Whatever. Does this normally happen to you?" Anko asked curiously.

"Hell, no! I don't get kissed randomly!"

"You did it to me!" Good point. But she's…she's Anko! Nothing fazes her, at least so other people can't tell. I'm that way too, but with romance…not so much, as I'm sure we've all noticed.

Once my senses pulled themselves together, I was able to stand up, but my knees were weak and I was a bit dizzy.

"Okay, Anko, I'll be at your house tomorrow at seven. Bye." I sauntered-- no, I'd say it was more of a float or a teeter-- out of the room and back to my house. On my way up the stairs to my apartment, I met up with Asuma, who was so blunt in pointing out something was wrong with me.

"Are you drunk?" he inquired.

"No, are you?" I replied.

"Actually, I'm high!" I looked at him and scooted away. Asuma made an annoyed face. "Just kidding, you little retard. So, what's made you so giggly and blush-y?"

"Nothing!" I answered.

"SURE." Asuma narrowed his eyes at me. "You got…KISSED. I can see it."

"Don't be gay, Asuma. That's ridiculous."

"Don't hide things that are so obvious blind people can see it!" he said in an unnecessarily high pitched voice.

"Speaking of drunk, where's your drunken girlfriend?" Asuma blinked and scowled.

"Uh…Oh! Kurenai! Yeah, she's at my house." he answered. It took that long…

"Hungover, I presume?" if Kurenai isn't hungover, I'm going to go shoot myself.

"Surprisingly, no. She's fine. A little tired but fine."

"Drinking what?" Okay…she's GOT to be drinking something…

"Nothing!" Asuma grinned. "Amazing, right?"

"Damn, it really is, Asuma, it really is." Asuma had to return to the topic I was trying to avoid.

"I'm going to go and take a guess…you were kissed by Anko. I can see it, you look so intoxicated."

"Well, so do you."

"Nuh-uh! I'm not drunk!"

"Yeah, I forgot, you're on crack!"

"You know what, likewise, okay, son, OKAY?"

"Don't talk to me that way!"

"Don't talk to _me _that way!"

"I own you! Shut up!"

"Hey mom, go to hell!"

"Want to repeat that, bastard?"

"Excuse me? You going around calling me a bastard? At least I have a girlfriend!"

"Yeah, a slutty one!"

"WHAT?!"

"You heard me!"

"I didn't hear nothing but the sound of your bones breaking!"

"That would be _your_ bones snapping!"

"You know what? I don't have time for this. Fuck you!"

"Likewise! I have a life to get on with. Unlike you."

"Get back here!"

---------------------------------

"Look at those losers!" Kurenai said, looking down the stairwell.

"That's hilarious!" Yuugao agreed.

"Fighting over nothing…HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Yeah, I know! Men are retarded." Kurenai nodded.

"Hey, look, vodka…"

---------------------------------

Haha, losers they are. Sounds like the kids at my school. Well, thanks for reading, and review.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: The Date That Determines Fate

Just because I don't own Naruto, doesn't mean you fools have to rub it in.

The next day, I found myself with a lot of energy-- yes, even in the morning, which made me wonder if my fall yesterday had an effect on me. I was totally awake, and it was evident when I ran into Tsunade's office. She noticed immediately, too.

"Okay, you're happy and energetic. What happened, or what are you so excited to about that has made you like this?" she asked.

"I'm fine." I replied quickly.

"Are you on crack?"

"NO!" I think _she's_ the one on crack. "Just…excited."

Tsunade looked at me for like, five minutes. "Ooh!" she cried. "You're going on a date!"

"HELL NO!" Damn it. Damn her. Damn myself…wait, what? "What kind of crazy hypothesis is that?"

"It's not a hypothesis, it's a conclusion! I know your secret!"

"You will never know! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

What has gotten into me? I'm a whacked out freak now. Better question: what did I eat this morning to make me so KRAZY? Let's see, coffee, the usual. Maybe I sugared it down too much. Oh, well, whatever. I went right through Tsunade's tasks, one after the other. I was on a roll!

Hayate was afraid of me, though. Since Anko got to have the day off, I was partnered with him. And, quite frankly, he was avoiding me. Not quite avoiding, but scooted away from me when I did something requiring will and energy.

"Amazing!" Hayate exclaimed. "You just did paperwork without complaining!"

I shrugged. "Yeah, well, it didn't seem so bad today."

"O-kay…"

"So when are you and Yuugao getting married?"

Hayate smiled.

"November nineteenth. I can't wait at all!"

"Hey, there's only about…" it's the thirtieth, so… "three weeks, or so! Not too long."

"Are we still having the alco-- Halloween party?" Hayate asked.

"I don't know. I'll ask Anko tonight, when--" I put a hand over my mouth. Oh shit.

Hayate looked up at me, curious.

" 'Tonight'? Hmm…" he smiled deviously.

"Uh, um, I meant tomorrow! See, I have, uh, a very important-- VERY IMPORTANT-- issue I have to pay attention to tonight. And I was thinking of it, so…"

"Oh, really?" scoffed Hayate. "Like…a date?"

"No, of course not!" I really think that if I died right now I'd end up in hell. Seriously. Not lying is on the ten commandments, right?

"I do. I'm dating Yuugao as our last date as fiancé and fiancée. The next three weeks will be spent packing and all that crap." Hayate said.

"Fun." I might as well shut my fucking mouth right now before anything else gets out and I end up in the DEPTHS of hell.

It was six o'clock sharp. An hour until Anko and I go to eat. Surprisingly…I'm not the least bit nervous. Aw, who am I kidding. I _wish_ I wasn't the least bit nervous.

…I'M FREAKING FLIPPING OUT!

I keep looking at the clock, and the thought of Anko invites the Reindeers into my shaky heart. I wonder if she feels the same way…probably not. Sane people don't feel that way, I'm sure. Only the crazy retards like me, who can't think about a girl without getting all antsy. I'm sure Hayate can think about girls with out suffering! …wait…he's engaged, so that doesn't count! Yeah, Asuma. I'm so sure he's thinking about Kurenai all the time, and do I ever see him even with even a tinge of pink to his cheeks? Or making weird convulsive movements? Hell, no!

But here I am, doing just that.

I'm dressed and ready, but mentally I don't think I ever will. I looked at my cell phone and I got a certain notion…I could simply call her and say I'm sick…of course. Simple.

I almost, almost did it. But Rudolph kind of spazzed and I had to relax for a second. UGH, this is hell. I try to do a good thing, and I get tortured. Why? WHY does this happen to me and no one else? I waited around until I couldn't take it any longer. I left my house and headed for hers.

The weather was…decent. Breezy, yet comfortably cool. Watch the weather turn icy tomorrow. …okay, maybe if I cared enough to watch the weather report, I'd be more aware. ANYWAY…the walking didn't take my mind off of Anko. It actually made me think about her more. Now I'm paranoid. Hooray.

I was standing in front of the torii. Yes, I was nervous as hell. The light above me, which had stopped blinking was enough to illuminate the path ahead for only a few feet, but in the distance, I saw light from behind the doors of Anko's house. I should just wait for her here…and no, it's not because I'm too scared. I looked at the floor until I heard the door open. It closed quickly, and I could see Anko's shape approaching. Was she wearing a DRESS? I couldn't tell until the light hit her, and even then I nearly fainted.

"Hey, Genma,"

I couldn't really reply. You know how she's got spastic hair? I don't know what she did to it, but it fell full length and perfectly curled. I think she was wearing eye shadow, and I was sure she was wearing lipstick. Anko was indeed wearing a dress, it was a deep red, and hit her knees, and over it she had a sort of vest that was black. She had on black tights and black boots that looked Russian. HOT or SEXY? Hmm…

"Genma? Hello?" she waved a hand in front of my face.

"Uh, oh! Sorry, sorry…you look really, really, good." I almost added the fact she looked really, REALLY sexy, but I decide to hold my tongue.

"Thanks." she said. "Now, where should we go?"

Dressed fancy as she was, I was going to take to somewhere…FANCY. Let's see…fancy, crazy high priced restaurants…AH! Hatsuye! Sure, it'll rid me of my pay completely, but oh well. This is something I'll never get back. My money, however, I will.

"Do you like Hatsuye?"

Anko brightened and clasped her hands energetically. She reminded me of the teens for a sec.

"I love it!"

"Let's go, then!"

Things I have done wrong: NONE! So far, anyway. I took her hand and we broke into a quick little walk. Did I just…take her hand? The thought made me want to recoil, but the way she clung on to me made me want to never let go.

The town was, for some reason, gussied up. Fancy lanterns were hanging above our heads, and there was dreamy air hanging around, thick with enticing scents of food and a tinge of sweets…that was one scent Anko caught.

"Oh, man, it smells like dango!" she exclaimed. Oh, right. She's ADDICTED to dango. It's her life, I swear. I'm not one for sweets, but dango is a different story. That's good stuff.

"I'm catching veggies and tempura."

"I hate tempura." Anko said, making a face.

"I love it!"

Anko laughed softly.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just that we've been walking like this all the way from my house to town with Kurenai and Asuma behind us."

"…what…?" I hope I heard that wrong. If I didn't, well, things were going to get violent. I glanced behind us partially, and Anko was right. The couple was holding back laughs. Crazy Bitch and…Stupid Smoker. I'll kill them ALL! HAHAHA!

"And why didn't you tell me?" I whispered to Anko. Anko shrugged.

" 'Cause. It doesn't matter, does it?" she replied with a wave of her hand. What is she, CRAZY? Of course it matters! Everyone's going to find out if--

"Smile!"

A flash erupted in front of me. Kiba held a camera, grinning.

"Thanks! Perfect for the yearbook, my myspace, facebook, deviantart, MSNBC, the paper, and for memories to harass you about!"

"You're welcome!" Anko called after him, waving. Then it hit me. Well, Kiba found out, so I'm screwed, but that's not the point. Who cares if everyone finds out I love her? It's called ROMANCE, people! If it weren't for that, we'd all either be dead or never born! It's step one to the cycle of life! DUH. How could I have been so retarded? Well, what can we say, that's me. Oh, yeah, I think Raidou has a girlfriend now…he was even happier than usual and didn't, wouldn't shut up about some girl. Tsubaki, I think her name was. Then Hayate joined in with chatting about Yuugao, and I was quiet…obviously. A hand hit my shoulder.

"I knew it! I SO FREAKING KNEW IT!" laughed Asuma.

"Yeah, well, whatever." I returned. I couldn't hide a smile, though. Kurenai burst out laughing, and that suddenly ticked me off.

"What are you laughing at, huh? You and Asuma are going out, too!"

The two looked at each other and shrugged.

"So?"

"…and you don't care if we humiliate you about it?"

Asuma scoffed.

"Son, we don't give a damn for what you fools have to say."

"Everyone, I mean EVERYONE knows we're a couple. Hello? Up in Suna we're famous!" added Kurenai. Is she still drunk? "Oh, yeah, love the outfit Anko!"

"Oh, thanks! It's, like, so nice…"

"Women…" mumbled Asuma.

"Yeah. OKAY! Enough fashion! C'mon, Anko…" I dragged her away. She waved at them and smiled at me.

"When was the last time you were on date?" Anko asked. I sucked in my breath. When _was _the last time I dated someone? Uhh…the last person I went out with was Shizune, in my junior year of high school. I remember I said something about her outfit, and then she got pissed and dumped me. She looked like a fucking slut! Her outfit was basically clumps of cloth strewn about! As my girlfriend, I was not going to let her wear that. This is how it went:

"Shizune, for the sake of life, take off-- no, PUT ON some fucking clothes. You look like a damned slut, my god! Even strippers look more decent than you!"

"EXCUSE ME? Fuck you!" and then she turned and left.

Pssh, what's so offensive about what I said? It was true, anyway. Women are so…incoherent.

By now, we were in front in the restaurant. I could already smell my food. We walked in, and Anko let out a squeal of delight .

"I love this place!"

"So do I."

I had been here so many times before. Why? Well, I'm from a rich family. They're really artistic, parents who are both virtuosos my mom in art and dad in music, and my brother's the famous sculptor. My sister is signing a record deal. But I have something they don't! I've got the physical advantage. Nobody would really think it from my attitude and my appearance, but I'm athletic. I can down a mile in less than five minute. Don't believe me? Yeah, Asuma didn't either, but I proved it him, he got DOMINATED by me. I'm also special 'cause I can't do any of those things they can do! And on the contrary, they suck at things that are "physically challenging". Whatever. My only problem is that I'm lazy.

We were seated in a fancy, closed off room with the pretty paper doors along with other quiet groups of people…couples. I suddenly remembered the fiasco we had at Anko's house. It was like déjà vu, we were seated a low table with our shoes off. But of course, I won't laugh if she makes any retarded comments-- okay, I will, but I won't be there for fifteen minutes in a hysteria…if I can help it. Anko and I didn't really shut up.

By the time the food we ordered came we were talking about pillows. PILLOWS. Before that, we were talking about recycling…what the hell, right?

"Oh, my pillow is like, fifty years old…"

"I got a new one yesterday!"

The waiter was kind of spooked, so he just set the food down and ran off. Anko I burst into a fit of giggles after that.

"Did you see the look on his face?" she giggled.

"Yeah! He thought we were either on drugs or possessed."

"What a loser!" she muttered.

"YES!" I agreed.

I found it took us forever to eat our food. We just couldn't shut our mouths! After every bite it seemed like a whole new conversation, a long one, had started. We stayed for longer than I thought, though…

"Excuse me, but we were supposed to close TWO HOURS ago." This time it was the manager staring at us-- glaring, I should say. "So please…"

"Oh, yeah, the bill--"

He leaned closer to us and growled, "We don't give for the damn money, we want you to LEAVE!" Hm, stroke of luck. The meal would've been something like one hundred and fifty dollars, and I was not ready to face those numbers.

"Okay! Let's go!"

Anko and I quickly out on our shoes and ran out.

Guess what? It was COLD. Bipolar weather, see? The dress Anko was wearing was low cut, so it must've been pretty drafty up there…the weather had dropped from sixty degrees to thirty or so. Damn, I feel like moving to Suna. They have a stable climate! Windy, but stable, and not bipolar. And what do you do when you're cold? You huddle up to people. So Anko and I walked to my place glued together. Our teeth were chattering and I was shaking like I was caught in an earthquake.

"W-what the hell happened for the t-temperature to drop?" she inquired.

"I have no f-freaking idea. I just know this d-d-damn country has bipolar weather." I answered. Best I could come up with.

"I'm l-losing the feeling in my thighs." Anko said.

"Oh, c-crap! You know what, screw the weather, you're s-staying with me." Anko looked at me, with a slight scowl.

"You sure?"

"Y-Yes!" I replied. "Oh, um, w-we're probably going to be sick tomorrow. Particularly you, with that dress."

"Oh, if t-that h-happens that means no alcohol p-party…" Anko murmured. "Or Halloween hell."

"Y-yeah."

We slid into my room, and I made a beeline to turn on the heater to seventy five degrees and Anko made a beeline for my bed, which she ripped the covers off of. I stuffed my hands in my armpits and collapsed onto my couch. Anko sat next to me and we pulled the covers around each other. Anko suddenly coughed and I felt a tickle in my lungs. Well, so much for partying. I'm already beginning to get a touch of that crummy feeling.

"I'll bring a jacket next time. Damn it, I am so dumb!" she said rather loudly.

"It wasn't your fault! No one had any idea the weather would be so messed up." Anko sighed and grimaced.

"True." she agreed, and then coughed again. She snuggled against me and I scooted next to her. The heater was hitting us from above, and it felt like someone were breathing down my back, but in a good way, not the stalker way. Well, it sort of did. I've been stalked enough today. I forgot about that though. I know I fell asleep curled up in a little ball. And when I woke up, I resented the weather, and Kiba so much.

_**REVIEW!**_


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Hell On Earth

Okay-- I can do this! No snappy things… okay. Ready? I don't own…aw, what the hell, Naruto is not mine, 'kay?

* * *

Oh. My. God. I had no idea this would happen. I thought I'd be fine when I woke up! I slept warmly and everything. But…that wasn't how it worked…I feel like shit…and I'm on the floor. Damn it, I haven't felt this crummy since I was a kid! I'm nauseous, VERY nauseous, and I'm warm. Wow, just my luck. I don't want to get up. Might as well, it's pretty pointless. Tsunade's going to be mad if I'm late, so let's see if I can even get up.

"Anko?"

"Hm…?"

"Are you awake?"

"Kind of."

Anko was still on my couch, and looked pretty damn comfy there. She sat up and made a face.

"Ugh. I feel absolutely terrible."

"Same." I replied. I'm seriously sure I have a fever. It feels like it, anyway. When I tasted something sweet in my mouth, I decided to call Tsunade. There was absolutely no way I was going anywhere feeling like this. I found my cell phone in my pocket and dialed.

"Hello?"

"I'm not coming today."

"…Why?" demanded Tsunade.

"I have a fever or something, I feel like crap."

"Hm."

"Yeah."

"Fine. Get better fast."

"Whatever."

…and I hung up. We can never find anything to talk about…

"Hey, do I feel hot to you?" Anko asked.

I reached over and put a hand on her head. She felt a bit warm.

"Yeah, you're warm. Me?"

A cool hand touched my forehead.

"Oh, yeah. You're not warm, you're actually hot."

"Damn it. Screw the weather."

"Look on the bright side," she said, "No Tsunade!" she has a very good point there. Anko looked sick herself, though.

"If you want, you can stay here until you feel like you can get home. I like having you here, anyway." I'm no going to make Anko leave and walk all the way back to her house if she feels this bad. That's freaking inhumane!

"Uh, okay. I'll only stay if _you _don't mind." she replied.

"Not a problem. I don't mind at all."

It would actually be nice to hang around with someone to talk to. Anko smiled at me.

"Hey, thanks. You can go to sleep...if you want." Anko said tentatively.

"Well, you can use my bed…if you want." I said, mocking her. Anko snickered.

"I feel alright. You're the one that looks sick. Go look at yourself. Or, wait, here."

Anko reached over for her purse and pulled something out. A make up compact…for what? She opened it and handed it to me.

"Uh--"

"Mirror."

"…right. I knew that!" I feel like a retard. I looked at myself, and was surprised at what I saw.

I've always been on the pale side, but I looked well, wan. Wan with a tinge of pink just below my eyes. I did look pretty bad, and tired, too. She was right.

"Whoa. I look pretty sick."

"Yes, you do. Actually, I think I'll feel better later. Now…do you want anything to eat?"

"I should be asking you that! But no, I'm not hungry. In fact, don't bring up food…please…" My stomach began to feel upset and I wished I had not mentioned food. Okay, good thoughts that don't involve food…uhh…dammit. Now that she mentioned it, I'm having issues getting it out of my mind.

"Oh, does it make you feel sick?"

I nodded.

"Sorry!" she apologized. "I thought…okay I'll shut up."

"Thanks…" I mumbled, rolling onto my stomach. That usually helps me.

Anko left about an hour and a half later. She felt fine, and looked fine too. I was alone, left to my disease and dying, fading away…okay, not quite. But I did feel like killing myself.

I don't get it. I don't get why I was stuck in bed for a WEEK, yes, a WEEK, seven days. SEVEN DAYS. Anko was wearing a dress, very drafty up on the chest, and she wasn't even bed for a DAY. I, on the other hand, had contracted the flu. The whole week, no-work, sleep and groan all day dealio. It was freaking horrible. I missed the alcohol-- ahem, Halloween party. I was busy in bed with a temperature of one hundred and three or so and an unstable stomach. If I were okay, I would've been drinking my alcohol and scaring small children.

I walked into Tsunade's office with trepidation, expecting to be yelled at for being sick.

"Genma! How are you feeling?" she got up and walked over to me, looking me up and down. "You've lost weight…"

"Uh…thanks?" is all women care about weight? Seriously, just because I look thinner it doesn't mean I care.

"Okay, Genma, there are people who I think are stealing things from the workroom. So, you've been paired with Kurenai, Hayate, Raidou, and Kotetsu." Is it really necessary to have five people guarding a damned copy machine? "Well, off you go!"

"Uh-huh."

Wow, my first day at work after a week and I get to do peon work. Hooray for me.

The workroom is a congested, paper smelling place which has a window where sunlight flows through abundantly. It's nice for that reason. But, it's not my favorite place at all. It has six copy machines and a bunch of other crap. I rounded into the room. This was my greeting:

"We thought you died." Kurenai said, cocking her head.

"HI!" Kotetsu and Raidou said loudly. Hayate smiled at me.

"Feeling better?"

"I guess. Yeah, I suppose." I sighed. "So…how was the alcohol party?"

Kurenai and Hayate exchanged glances.

"It was, um, nice." Kurenai mumbled.

"Did you get drunk?" I asked, expecting a "yes".

"No, but I drank six liters of vodka this time!" she said cheerily.

"…okay…"

"No, I did not get hungover." she added. How does she do it?

"Anyway," Hayate said, "it was great. Very sophisticated, but it wasn't the same. Anko seemed to miss you."

"Ohh, really?" I said, faking innocence. "Hm."

"Izumo got so drunk!" Kotetsu blurted out. "He was like, delirious!"

"Oh, yeah!" Hayate said, laughing. "That was so funny."

I hate it when people talk about things I wasn't a part of. It always ticks me off. It has since I was a kid.

"Now, what the hell are we supposed to do here?" I asked them.

Everyone exchanged blank glances.

"Uh, stand around and wait until someone tries to come in, and then strangle them. Right, Raidou?" Kurenai said lazily.

"Huh?" Raidou looked around and his dreamy look was erased. "Oh, hm, yeah." he mumbled. Kotetsu sighed.

"Dreaming about your dearest Tsubaki?" he said in a mocking tone. Leave it to Kotetsu to do that.

"Yes…" sighed Raidou. Kotetsu snickered.

"Raidou. RAIDOU!"

"EH?"

"Get your hand out of the paper shredder and pay attention to what you're doing!" barked Kurenai. As she did that, she waved her hand around. Something caught my eye, but I ignored it and decided to mess around with the copy machine.

I pressed buttons randomly, listening in to Kurenai and Hayate talk about things that shouldn't be said in an environment where children could be.

"He's a fucking prick don't you--"

"KURENAI!" We turned to the doorway. Kiba stood there, mouth in a perfect "o" and eyebrows raised. Kurenai laughed nervously.

"Hi…Kiba…"Kurenai mumbled.

"COOL! My teacher cusses! I can't wait to tell Shino. Oh, yeah, he likes you. Like, thinks you're hot. And other things I shouldn't tell you. Oh, whoops, I told his deep dark secret to a bunch of chatty adults! Oh well. Hey, I gotta use that copy machine…"

"Ah, don't think so!" I said. "If you have to do something, I'll do it for you. Now…what is it you need done? Kiba studied me for a while. Dumb teens.

"Hey! I haven't seen you in a long time! Were you on a mission?"

"No, I was sick, now what do you need to make copies of?" Kiba smiled sheepishly.

"Eheheh…things."

Oh crap. "Let me see."

"NO!" he shouted.

I feel heat rising up to my head.

"Kiba, what the fuck is it?"

"It's the stuff I put on my myspace…" Well, shit, I'm screwed.

"Find another place. Bye."

I pushed him out of the room and returned to the copy machine, but stopped. A shimmer caught my eye. In her conversation, Kurenai waved an arm, and the shimmer appeared again. I walked over, curious.

"Kurenai?"

"What?" she said irritably. "I'm busy."

"Yes, I know, but could you hold out you hands for a minute?" Kurenai looked at me with a scowl, and finally held out her hand. No bracelet on either hand. I went down further and stopped. A ring. A diamond circlet around her ring finger on her left hand was the sparkle. I sucked in my breath. No way.

"You're…your ring…" I began.

Kurenai smiled warmly.

"Right. You were sick. Yes, I'm engaged. I have been for…almost twelve hours."

I looked at Hayate for confirmation. He nodded.

"To Asuma, right?" That was a dumb question, who else?

"Yes…he was so romantic in his proposal,"

I suddenly got an image of Asuma dropping a knee, and suavely saying, "Will you marry me" and Kurenai looking all sexy and saying, "Yes, of course." Pssh…Now we had two swooning people in the room. Make that three. Hayate started about Yuugao. And then Kotetsu came in with talking about Hana, Kiba's _normal_ sister.

Why is everyone getting married all of a sudden, huh? What's up with that? I don't get it.

"So, when's the wedding going to be?" I asked.

"Oh, sometime in January. Anyway, he was sooo sweet and then…"

I tuned out and focused on the copy machine. I realized they were very vulgar…so big and noisy…hmph. Okay, I have nothing better to do than analyze office equipment. Don't harass me about it.

"…she's just so sexy!" squealed Raidou. That snapped my sanity.

"Damn it, will you ever shut up?" I snapped.

"What's your deal?" demanded Kotetsu. "Jealous?"

"No, you retard! What's your problem?"

"I'm not having any problems with anything, except for you!" he retorted.

"Go make yourself useful and shut the hell up."

"HEY!" screamed Kurenai. "Fucking shut up, both of you, or face my wrath of PMS. You two are both likely to die if you don't shut up right now."

I did not need to know she was in PMS, but whatever! I'll just play along and pretend I'm just mad at nothing. I'm going to get them to shut up one way or another.

* * *

That was fun! Mkay, _**REVIEW! THANKS! **_

By the way...so sorry for the ridiculously late update. I was consumed by Bleach.


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